Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Meet Margaret

Introducing Margaret: Infomaniac’s new health inspector…


[via]

Some of you may have been wondering, “Who is this Margaret and why is she infiltrating Mistress MJ’s comment box?

Rest assured that Mistress MJ has known Margaret for some time.

Margaret can be found operating the gift shop over at Cookie’s successful salon, The Hair Hall of Fame. At The Hair Hall of Fame you’ll find not only Margaret and Cookie but bitchin’ beauticians such as Mistress MJ herself, Normadesmond, Jason, AyeM8y, Thom, and other skilled stylists.

Margaret will be making appearances here on Infomaniac from time to time to inspect the premises and report on her findings.

And did we mention she has an evil twin?...

42 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. But you can't tell from the photo which one Margaret is....

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    2. The one pinching your ass is Margaret, Wally.

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    3. They're both pinching my ass!

      Gotta go pee in a cup now.
      See Ya!

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    4. Double your pleasure, double your fun!

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    5. In this case, Wally is man enough for the both of us! *Come play with us*

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    6. Poor, long-suffering Wally.

      He never knew what hit him.

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    7. He will when the child support agency contacts him.

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    8. Are you and your evil twin expecting twins, Margaret?

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  2. Where was Margaret during the great leprosy debacle of 2010(?), we needed her then. Pllease could you ask her to do a thorough inspection of Mr Pirate.
    Sx

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Remember when I started legal proceedings?

      Of course we’ll ignore AyeM8y’s version of events.

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    2. AyeM8y cooperates nicely by laying on his back while I scratch his belly (or at least I think it's his underside..?).

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  3. Does Nurse Margaret have time to look at a rash? Uh, I'm asking for "a friend."

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    Replies
    1. Let’s hope Nurse Margaret drops by sometime today to discuss this intimate matter with you, Mr. Lax.

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    2. Tell your "friend" to stop rolling in his own brown matter (or yellow snow).

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  4. There's been a crying need for a health inspector here at Schloss Infomaniac and I intend to set a good example by volunteering. *unscrews neck bolts*

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    Replies
    1. The thought of you teaming up with Margaret will frighten some of our more sensitive Bitches, Ms. Nations.

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    2. If this is a "Frankenstein" moment, may I ask if you can tighten MJ's pelvic joints? She has over-used them until they have formed rust, and I can hear the squeaking all the way from Canada. Annoying.

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    3. And YOUR parts have rusted over due to LACK of use, Margaret.

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    4. Don't tell Wally. He thinks he's been quite effective.

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  5. i saw the good housekeeping seal that
    approved the syringe at sea world.

    as it jumped and did tricks,
    the syringe flopped,
    the flippers flapped,
    & margaret stood by with the fish.

    (you know they called her kissass in school)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Stop bending over, norma. And for pete sake, get non-clumping TP.

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    2. Speaking of TP, we had a problem a couple of years ago with The Scourge.

      Will you be on toilet patrol from now on, Margaret?

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  6. Why, I've been using "Saniseal" as a courtesy lobster bib! So, no, that job will fall into your dirty little crabby claws.

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    Replies
    1. Toilet patrol?

      I’ve hired a clown to do it for me.

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    2. Oh, your BIL?

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  7. just what this place needs... A hygiene inpector.... and it looks from the pictures that Margaret is just the man for the job....

    As MJ says to all her new Bitches...

    "Welcome Aboard"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. PRINNY: Speaking of welcoming Margaret aboard, I wonder if she’d like to set sail on the Infomaniac Love Boat?

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    2. Oh, all hands on dick, I mean deck!

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  8. PS: Margaret, it is traditional for all newbies to ask Mistress MJ for cake.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. She wouldn’t dare ask, Mr. Lax.

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    2. I don't like icing, so no, not asking.

      Just shoving..."cake" into my mouth.

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    3. You mean into your CAKEHOLE, Margaret.

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    4. You're a jealous, jealous little snippet, and I mean to fashion a very special syringe for you over the holidays.

      Do you even have holidays in CN?

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  9. I was informed by a friend that this was the place to visit to fulfill a special need, please let me explain:

    I am a Chef, quite renown, especially for my signature sourdough bread. Recently during a relocation I lost my most precious yeast culture. Oh, the horror! I have catered affairs scheduled all throughout this holiday season. Could Nurse Margaret please, please help me find a suitable culture during her rounds?

    I am willing to pay top dollar.

    Pardon me for being so forward, but I really need to find a decent, aromatic culture for my recipe. Won't you please help an aging woman hold onto the last shreds of what has otherwise been a brilliant career?

    Thank you all.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. CHEFFIE POO: Welcome to Infomaniac!

      Perhaps you should be discussing yeast cultures with our dear friend Norma.

      Norma’s muffin was dismissed from the Kitchen Queen Contest as being too yeasty.

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    2. i'm meeting with my team as i type,
      we're putting the finishing touches on my
      new franchise opportunity.

      want my yeast? get in line.

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    3. You’ll need some background music for your new enterprise, Norma.

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    4. music? between the firing range AND the
      yeast rising, who could possibly hear music?

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    5. "Step aside!!!"

      First, fill I will fill the cold syringe with Kreml, smile glibly (as I am able), and ram it into the orifice of choice.

      Then wait.

      And wait.

      And wait some more.

      Lifting your flap, will check for yeast growth and bubbling.

      If sufficient, I will pat you on the hindquarters, and spin you around, and send you into traffic.

      If no yeast growth, ask norma. That's HER department, and she is quite "hefty" in producing strong, bubbly farts.

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    6. Margaret puts the "fun" in "fungus."

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    7. The fungus among us.

      I like scraping until I get down to raw hide.

      Literally.

      I have Male and Female Syringes.

      Filled with oodles of ooze.

      Cheffie Poo will you give me some of your goo?

      Delete