Tuesday, September 01, 2009

Secret Lady Place

It is known by many names




But from now on, if you must mention it at all, you will refer to our lady bits as our Secret Lady Place.

We wish to thank the always fabulous TJB at Stirred, Straight Up, With a Twist for making Secret Lady Place our new favourite phrase.



[photo via Stirred, Straight Up, With a Twist]

65 comments:

  1. YAY FIRST
    Obviously not the first to enter Miss MJ's secret lady place , but you know what I mean

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  2. You might be the first to live afterwards though, Beast?

    Yay! Second!

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  3. I like it. I will use it at least three times in conversation tomorrow. And I'm not talking about in a naughty phone call to you, MJ!

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  4. whats wrong with 'twat'?

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  5. It is now my new catch phrase.

    I shall use Secret Lady Place in all conversations mercilessly and without hesitation


    ***Jesus H could I *be* more sycophantic..............
    FARK YEAH BITCHES !!!!!****

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  6. I was fifth until Damien slipped in there.

    Humpf.

    I quite like Lady Garden myself (not in THAT way, I prefer out door plumbing).

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  7. But Mistress, shouldn't we say "beaver" to remain in CanCon compliance????

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  8. I'm next, sloppy ninth! I'm not bothered about being first or second or anything in MJ's secret lady place.

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  9. Oreos or custard creams...

    mmmm...

    BOTH!

    I hate making hard decisions.

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  10. i like this mj...finally i can use the word pussy as it was intended and not for the secret lady place :)

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  11. So Miss Scarlet likes a whole box of custard creams all at once, and Roses likes both Oreos and custard creams at the same time.
    Hmmm...interesting.

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  12. I shall forevermore refer to it only as 'That Fucking Abomination'.

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  13. The opposite would be "L'origin du monde".

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  14. A friend of mine used to call it Itching Bear. I don't know if she had an unfortunate case of eczema.

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  15. I think Piggy is right.

    Who are you trying to kid Miss MJ?

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  16. anything is better than vajayjay, sugar! xoxoxo

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  17. I love visiting holey places.......

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  18. This would not be one of Them though, would it Tony?

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  19. BEAST: YAY FIRST
    Obviously not the first to enter Miss MJ's secret lady place , but you know what I mean


    This would be amusing were it not for the fact that we’ve all seen you use your backside as a fruit bowl.

    IVD: You might be the first to live afterwards though, Beast?

    This too would be amusing were it not for the fact you could park a lorry in your gaping front bottom and STILL have room left over.

    AWKWARD: I like it. I will use it at least three times in conversation tomorrow. And I'm not talking about in a naughty phone call to you, MJ!

    How’s it going so far?

    Please report back to us.

    BEAVER HUNTER: whats wrong with 'twat'?

    I didn’t hear you…twat did you say?

    DAMIEN: It is now my new catch phrase.
    I shall use Secret Lady Place in all conversations mercilessly and without hesitation
    ***Jesus H could I *be* more sycophantic..............
    FARK YEAH BITCHES !!!!!****


    Someone’s had their espresso fix of the day.

    Did you know that Piggy has a Secret Lady Place too?

    ROSES: I was fifth until Damien slipped in there.
    Humpf.
    I quite like Lady Garden myself (not in THAT way, I prefer out door plumbing).


    Lady Garden?

    Do your bushes need trimming?

    XL: But Mistress, shouldn't we say "beaver" to remain in CanCon compliance????

    We don’t want the CRTC breathing down our necks, do we?

    KAPI: I prefer "Special Soft Place".

    Mistress MJ has a “Special Soft Place” for you in her heart.

    *collective awwwww*

    GINRO: I'm next, sloppy ninth! I'm not bothered about being first or second or anything in MJ's secret lady place.

    What a difference a day makes.

    It was only last week when you were pleading with me to carry your love child.

    SCARLET: ...box of creams, anyone?

    We’ll give you two boxes of creams if you continue to blog.

    ROSES: Oreos or custard creams...
    mmmm...
    BOTH!
    I hate making hard decisions.


    *hands Roses a bottle of hooch*

    Decision making made easy.

    DAISY: i like this mj...finally i can use the word pussy as it was intended and not for the secret lady place :)

    Good to see you again, Miss Daisy!

    Miss Scarlet may be taking a blogging break and I need someone to help me battle Beast.

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  20. GINRO: So Miss Scarlet likes a whole box of custard creams all at once, and Roses likes both Oreos and custard creams at the same time.
    Hmmm...interesting.


    Shall we wake you up or do you want to go on dreaming?

    PIGGY: I shall forevermore refer to it only as 'That Fucking Abomination'.

    This is an abomination.

    MAGO: The opposite would be "L'origin du monde".

    Let’s link to it here in hopes that Piggy will click it.

    BETTY: A friend of mine used to call it Itching Bear. I don't know if she had an unfortunate case of eczema.

    Stay well clear of her type, Betty.

    Actually, “Itching Bear” sounds like a rather hairy member of the gay community who’s infected with crabs.

    CYBERPOOF: I think Piggy is right.
    Who are you trying to kid Miss MJ?


    Shouldn’t you be sleeping off your jet lag?

    SAVANNAH: anything is better than vajayjay, sugar! xoxoxo

    Hallelujah!

    TONY: I love visiting holey places.......

    Please get down on your knees as you enter the Temple.

    CYBERPOOF: This would not be one of Them though, would it Tony?

    Get back to bed.

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  21. MJ:*collective awwwww*

    Makes a change from the collective ewwwww!

    As for Itching Bear...a homeless native American?

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  22. Kapi you stole my line!

    *takes a long swig of hooch*

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  23. KAPI: MJ:*collective awwwww*
    Makes a change from the collective ewwwww!
    As for Itching Bear...a homeless native American?


    Or Itching Boar … Piggy!

    BOXER: amen to what Savannah said.

    My people will be speaking with Oprah’s people.

    ROSES: Kapi you stole my line!
    *takes a long swig of hooch*


    Don’t listen to her, Kapi.

    It’s the liquor talking.

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  24. Well I'd assumed they were using double entendres Mistress MJ. Or innuendos. Whichever. lol. So that's what Roses meant when she was going on about her gardening?

    But as you and Miss Scarlet positively refused to have my love child, I'm going back to sleep.

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  25. Once I can uncross my eyes and get my tongue back in my mouth.

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  26. You asked how it's going so far. Not great. One of my employees has been a bit of a problem. I asked her if her Secret Lady Place needs some attention or what? She mentioned something about legal counsel and stormed off.

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  27. GINRO: Well I'd assumed they were using double entendres Mistress MJ. Or innuendos. Whichever. lol. So that's what Roses meant when she was going on about her gardening?
    But as you and Miss Scarlet positively refused to have my love child, I'm going back to sleep.
    Once I can uncross my eyes and get my tongue back in my mouth.


    I think Roses might be up for a shag as long as you’ve rid yourself of those breast implants.

    AWKWARD: You asked how it's going so far. Not great. One of my employees has been a bit of a problem. I asked her if her Secret Lady Place needs some attention or what? She mentioned something about legal counsel and stormed off.

    Your technique is sadly lacking.

    You need tips on how to talk to girls and this nine-year-old boy will guide you.

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  28. Ginro, perhaps not the best chat up line ever.

    Suggesting that it's going to take at least a couple of days to get my 'Lady Garden' in order isn't making me hot for you baby.

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  29. ROSES: Ginro, perhaps not the best chat up line ever.
    Suggesting that it's going to take at least a couple of days to get my 'Lady Garden' in order isn't making me hot for you baby.


    We suggest that Ginro take note of the video link in our last comment to Awkward.

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  30. Suggesting that it's going to take at least a couple of days to get my 'Lady Garden' in order...

    Eh? Where the hell did I say that?

    But I checked the video out. Apart from the advice about "...letting it stick out a little bit but not too much." I think I'm ready.

    Erm...

    *Blushes*

    Hello

    *Blushes even more then runs away.

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  31. What a nice title to SNATCH.

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  32. Flappy flap flaps.

    Says it all really.

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  33. GINRO: But I checked the video out. Apart from the advice about "...letting it stick out a little bit but not too much." I think I'm ready.
    Erm...
    *Blushes*
    Hello
    *Blushes even more then runs away.


    Here’s a more grown-up book for you then.

    HEFF: What a nice title to SNATCH.

    Classy, as always, Heff.

    GARFY: Flappy flap flaps.
    Says it all really.


    You really ARE the last of the romantics.

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  34. I slept until 3.30pm today from 10pm last night so I'm all better I think. At least until tomorrow.

    But thanks for caring.

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  35. Well as Peenee said, “It’s hardly a secret that your Secret Lady Place is well known all over town”. I like your Big Brown Beaver just as much ‘cept it bites.

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  36. it's all a big mystery to me....which is disappointing....mainly for little miss manuel....

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  37. In "our" house "we" refer to "our" "time of the month" as Lady Business. It all fits so perfectly.

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  38. It's been called a large wet rodent?
    I'm glad to see it's secret now.

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  39. CYBERPOOF: I slept until 3.30pm today from 10pm last night so I'm all better I think. At least until tomorrow.
    But thanks for caring.


    Who said anything about caring?

    We’re just grateful you’re asleep so we can get some peace.

    AYEM8Y: Well as Peenee said, “It’s hardly a secret that your Secret Lady Place is well known all over town”. I like your Big Brown Beaver just as much ‘cept it bites.

    We’re so pleased you could take time out from your busy schedule servicing the gents along county road 39 and up into service road 27 then down the alligator corridor.

    How’s that going?

    MANUEL: it's all a big mystery to me....which is disappointing....mainly for little miss manuel....

    Perhaps if you spent less time with your cousins and those fellas who pee on your sofa and more time with LMM?

    Just a suggestion.

    LEAH: In "our" house "we" refer to "our" "time of the month" as Lady Business. It all fits so perfectly.

    We refer to it as SATANIC CRAMPS FROM HELL but each to her own.

    JASON: It's been called a large wet rodent?
    I'm glad to see it's secret now.


    Speaking of rodents, don’t make me use the Squirrelizer on you.

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  40. Oh, my mistake!

    I tried sleeping and I can't. Will you make me a cup of hot chocolate and give me an Oreo?

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  41. How’s that going?

    Well it would be going a lot better if I didn’t have competition from all the Big Brown Beavers!

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  42. Haven't seen one in so long, willing to go along with any terminology!

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  43. CYBERPOOF: Oh, my mistake!
    I tried sleeping and I can't. Will you make me a cup of hot chocolate and give me an Oreo?


    Hmmm…that was almost two hours ago.

    Let’s hope he’s dropped off and forgotten what he came here for.

    AYEM8Y: How’s that going?
    Well it would be going a lot better if I didn’t have competition from all the Big Brown Beavers!


    They’ll take one look at you and KNOW they’ve got STIFF competition!

    XL: Haven't seen one in so long, willing to go along with any terminology!

    Do you need to be shown a diagram?

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  44. Where is my bloody hot chocolate and Oreos?

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  45. [peers over top of diagram thoughtfully provided by Mistress MJ]

    Oh Hai Pete!

    [resumes study]

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  46. CYBERPOOF & XL: Can’t I get a little peace and quiet in here for once?

    I’m headed down to the oubliette for the night so don’t come looking for me as I won’t be back ‘til morning.

    There is much work to be done down there as you’ll see.

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  47. Between this and popped collars, I should have gotten patents on the goddamned things.

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  48. TJB: Between this and popped collars, I should have gotten patents on the goddamned things.

    Nobody said that being a style maven AND a muse would be easy.

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  49. AYEM8Y: I thought we agreed on sharing TJB as our muse.

    Besides, you also have Mitzi.

    In fact, if I recall correctly, you have NINE muses!

    I have twin muses: TJB and Thombeau.

    And you A-muse me.

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  50. MAGO: It’s enough to give one beaver fever.

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  51. I am blogging... but very slowly...
    Sx

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  52. SCARLET: We’ll take what we can get!

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  53. Its enough to give you beaver fever... I am off home now...

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  54. MUTLEY: Its enough to give you beaver fever... I am off home now...

    We almost missed seeing your comment due to your new Cloak of Invisibility.

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  55. Castor canadensis is soooooooo very tired of being a laughing joke. I'm sure Castor canadensis would love to have "Secret Lady Place" take over.

    Although, 'beaver' has put beaver on the map, and Canada wouldn't be Canada without beaver, right MJ?

    As a wildlife biologist, I've done several beaver surveys over the last 20 years, and am very, very tired of the lame jokes that come back at me as a result.

    So, both wildlife biologists and Castor canadensis both endorse "Secret Lady Place", but we also have a penchant for "Lady Garden."

    Just so you know.

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  56. NWTRUNNER: Castor canadensis is soooooooo very tired of being a laughing joke. I'm sure Castor canadensis would love to have "Secret Lady Place" take over.
    Although, 'beaver' has put beaver on the map, and Canada wouldn't be Canada without beaver, right MJ?
    As a wildlife biologist, I've done several beaver surveys over the last 20 years, and am very, very tired of the lame jokes that come back at me as a result.
    So, both wildlife biologists and Castor canadensis both endorse "Secret Lady Place", but we also have a penchant for "Lady Garden."
    Just so you know.


    You conduct beaver surveys?

    Then Infomaniac is the perfect place to hold a poll!

    Shall we organize one for the weekend?

    WIL & TJB: Will you kooky kids cut it out?

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  57. Well...this made waking up at 4am a hell of alot better!

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  58. JILL: Well...this made waking up at 4am a hell of alot better!

    Just add caffeine and you’re good to go!

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