A question to ponder...
Where are The Shorts?
Are they still in the possession of Princess, our most recent winner? Or have they met with foul play?...
[via]
There have been inquiries and fans of TFGES want to know their whereabouts. They want answers!
The Freakin' Green Elf Shorts have graced the backsides of several Infomaniac Bitches including:
EROSWINGS...
MR. DeVICE...
MISS SCARLET...
and THE MISTRESS, herself...
Perhaps Prinny is seated at her sewing machine, making some last minute adjustments to The Shorts...
If you're reading this, Prinny, please let us know when we can expect the next Freakin' Green Elf Shorts Caption Competition.
Note: For the uninitiated, please refer to The Definitive History of the Freakin' Green Elf Shorts, a tradition since 2004.
It is the End Times of blogging. My readership is down to about the same 20 people; I might as well send out a mass email.
ReplyDeleteThat's what I like to hear as we hurtle towards another weekend. Optimism. Jx
DeleteWould it do any good to suggest you post more. I know blogging is a job. It gets old. I had a blog years ago and let it go. I do enjoy your posts. Check your site daily. Always happy to see a new thought when you post. That said it’s been 10 days since your last entry. The Mistress gets grief if she disappears for a week or more.
DeleteWhither Peeenee’s readership?
DeleteIt’s the same here at Infomaniac but The Mistress feels that those who comment regularly are loyal Bitches and that matters more than numbers.
So keep it up, Peenee. We're fans!
I’m definitely a fan of Peenee and the Mistress. Sounds like the title of a short story from an old porn mag, Peenee and the Mistress.
DeletePeenee and The Mistress...
DeleteIf you combine our names, you get Pistress!
"Mass email" Is that how the catholics get people to church these days?
ReplyDeleteActually they have the mass on the T&V at 6 Sunday mornings.
DeleteMass? Also available through live streaming!
DeleteI’m fingering my rosary as we speak.
Is that what you call it. Your roasary.
DeleteThat's my story and I'm stickin' to it.
DeleteRosary? I thought those were anal beads.
DeleteI even shutter what has been soiled in them since.
ReplyDeleteMISTRESS MADDIE: Beast won The Shorts at some point but Miss Scarlet wrested them from his filthy clutches.
DeleteMuch more than Febreze was necessary to restore them.
Oh dear... the last i saw of them they were safely secured in a bottling jar... I hope the Empress hasn't turned them into an apple sponge pudding to feed to the homeless....
ReplyDeletePRINNY: It’s good to hear that The Shorts are safe…ish.
DeletePlease let us know when you plan the next competition. The Mistress receives emails from readers (both current and old and even unknown readers) who are chomping at the bit to participate.
A DINGO ATE MY FGES!!!
ReplyDeleteOr whisked away by a wombat.
DeleteJon from Redcar! Schwing!!!
ReplyDeleteEros! *faints*
::revives enough to wish that you'd used my "drill" photo rather than my "Wicked Witch of the East" photo::
DeleteWe here at Infomaniac do not wish to promote the unsafe use of power tools in the bathtub.
DeleteAlso, it might set off Miss Scarlet all over again about bathmats.
Also, I LOVE your Definitive History! I've read it so many times, but it's still bloody brilliant. However, I do have to pause when I get to SID's part because I also have "stifle peals of laughter" both at his photo (and Smunty's caption) and at the thought of you also stifling peals of laughter!! Good times!
ReplyDeleteI almost used SID’s photo as the first photo on this post. Yes, it still cracks me up to this day.
DeleteThanks again for the fabulous map we used in the “Definitive” post.
I think SID's photo is probably my favourite. He really went to town with it.
DeleteI've just noticed that the map in your Definitive History is not the most up-to-date. The most current one can be found here (for when you feel like updating the History).
MR. DeVICE: Thanks for the updated map. I’ll replace it soonish. Which might mean next week.
DeleteAh, the FGES! It's become a blogging icon! Blessed are we to witness its travels and what joy we revel in from the fantastic creativity it inspires.
ReplyDeleteEROS: Blessed are we who gaze upon your physique in The Shorts.
DeleteI would love to win the shorts again! I may though crack open my piggy bank and book a flight to Australia to steal them back. I've done it before, I can do it again. Although Dorset is a lot closer.
ReplyDeleteSx
Perhaps a rule could be made that former winners be ineligible to win again? Give some of us less clever people a fair chance.
DeleteSCARLET: Someone must get Prinny to pull her finger out.
DeleteIf not, you must go to Australia and wrest them from her clutches.
RIMPY: The only person who won twice is Mr. DeVice. That was in 2012, the year I decided to relax the rule.
Previous to 2012, we imposed a rule where the winner must be someone new. That gave everyone a fair chance and also instilled new blood in The Shorts.
However, there aren’t as many people who enter anymore so it wouldn’t be much of a competition if previous winners weren’t allowed to enter.
Yes, these Bitches are a clever lot but I'm sure you're up to the challenge.
Very kind of you to say so.
DeleteOh, yes, keep at it, Rimpy I loved your captions when I hosted the the compo the second time (I won them again by accident - promise!), and if it wasn't for Princess, you would have got them!
DeleteSqueeeeee!
DeleteHow many people just ejaculated after taking in that "speak peek" of the Mistress? Whoa.
ReplyDeleteNORMA: If we're talking Infomaniac Bitches, I'd say chances are slim.
DeleteI threw up a little bit in my mouth if that helps, Norma?
Delete