Thursday, September 16, 2010

Road Trippin’ Refreshments

On day one of our road trip, the Infomaniac Bitches pause for a lovely cream tea (tea served with scones, clotted cream and jam) at Café C in Dorchester, Dorset…


[via]

A lively discussion ensued ‘round the table when Mitzi enquired, “How do you take your cream tea?” Cream on the top of the scone first followed by a dollop of jam (Devonian method)? Or jam on the top of the scone first followed by cream (Cornish method)?

Feel free to jump in if you have an opinion to offer one way or another.

And we’d like to know your favourite tea room (phrase subject to interpretation) so that we might pop by when the road trip passes through your town.

34 comments:

  1. 2nd!

    Oh, wait. I must have nodded off a bit. Got any Cheetos?

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  2. The Straw Dogs Tearoom scone is the best. Topped with Dustin Hoffman.

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  3. i'd love to go on a roadtrip, but the MITM has seized my credit cards, sugar! something about the high heels that were on the last bill! xoxoxoxo

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  4. thank you, i'm fine. just bring me a paper cup with water, to go. and maybe i will have a scone, but i want my cream and my jam separate, please.

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  5. I find the frizzed 80's hair far more objectionable than the big jugs lineup.

    As for cream tea I'll take however the Duchess of Devonshire likes it. (I'm just waiting to move in to Chatsworth; any time now...)

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  6. is tea room code for a real bar?

    please say yes.

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  7. I believe that something stiff can often be found in a tea room... or so I'm told...

    But getting back to the Cream Tea..

    I prefer to slather the scone with lashings of jam and then smother it with mountains cream...

    What does that make me?...

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  8. And here I thought those dreadful scones were consumed au naturel or with Lurpak butter.

    Silly me.

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  9. Cream tea? ok is it tea as in "eating yer tea?" which means dinner or tea as in we're English please slap us?
    The Cornish get a free pass as they were only classed as human in the 1950's but those from Devon just need to go.
    I'm off to google ' cream tea' on the porno webby sites in case yer taking the piss and it really means something Old Knudsen has never heard of.

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  10. Jam on top of cream or cream on top of jam, I'll take whatever these waitresses are serving, so long as I get to do some of the jamming and creaming on their scones.

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  11. Cyberpete, a scone well baked is a wonderous thing.

    I like lashing of cholesterol with my cholesterol.

    Scone, butter with unsalted butter followed by a layer of jam and then completely obscured by clotted cream. If you can see the scone, you've not got enough on it. Of course you'll end up wearing most of it, but the clean up just adds to the fun.

    I do wish Robert Downey Jr would accept my invitation for cream tea, but his lawyers don't seem to appreciate the finer things.

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  12. XL: 1st!
    2nd!
    Oh, wait. I must have nodded off a bit. Got any Cheetos?


    This is not the Britney Spears tour.

    GARFER: The Straw Dogs Tearoom scone is the best. Topped with Dustin Hoffman.

    I’ll mark you down for the Cornish method, in that case.

    MAGO: These are creampies?

    This isn’t that kind of road trip.

    SAVANNAH: i'd love to go on a roadtrip, but the MITM has seized my credit cards, sugar! something about the high heels that were on the last bill!

    Those shoes are rightfully yours.

    Let me have a word with him.

    NORMADESMOND: thank you, i'm fine. just bring me a paper cup with water, to go. and maybe i will have a scone, but i want my cream and my jam separate, please.

    A separatist in our ranks!

    MICHAEL GUY: I find the frizzed 80's hair far more objectionable than the big jugs lineup.
    As for cream tea I'll take however the Duchess of Devonshire likes it. (I'm just waiting to move in to Chatsworth; any time now...)


    Stacia mentioned yesterday that the convertible top of the Barbie mobile would ruin her hair and she was right.

    Just look at the state of us!

    And yet with a hairstylist on board!

    Oh, and Chatsworth is waiting for you to put your design spot upon it.

    BOXER: is tea room code for a real bar?
    please say yes.


    If you need a drink THAT badly (and we know you do), then yes.

    As mentioned, the phrase “tea room” is subject to interpretation.

    PRINCESS: I believe that something stiff can often be found in a tea room... or so I'm told...
    But getting back to the Cream Tea..
    I prefer to slather the scone with lashings of jam and then smother it with mountains cream...
    What does that make me?...


    That would depend upon which type of tea room you’re visiting.

    CYBERPOOF: And here I thought those dreadful scones were consumed au naturel or with Lurpak butter.
    Silly me.


    You’re excused as you’re Danish.

    Perhaps you need Miss Roses to show you the way around a scone.

    KNUDSEN: Cream tea? ok is it tea as in "eating yer tea?" which means dinner or tea as in we're English please slap us?
    The Cornish get a free pass as they were only classed as human in the 1950's but those from Devon just need to go.
    I'm off to google ' cream tea' on the porno webby sites in case yer taking the piss and it really means something Old Knudsen has never heard of.


    Sometimes a cream tea is just a cream tea.

    Although Mago thinks we’re serving creampies.

    EROS: Jam on top of cream or cream on top of jam, I'll take whatever these waitresses are serving, so long as I get to do some of the jamming and creaming on their scones.

    Those are no waitresses…those are Infomaniac bitches!

    ROSES: Cyberpete, a scone well baked is a wonderous thing.
    I like lashing of cholesterol with my cholesterol.
    Scone, butter with unsalted butter followed by a layer of jam and then completely obscured by clotted cream. If you can see the scone, you've not got enough on it. Of course you'll end up wearing most of it, but the clean up just adds to the fun.
    I do wish Robert Downey Jr would accept my invitation for cream tea, but his lawyers don't seem to appreciate the finer things.


    I’ve a feeling Miss Roses would like to slather RDJ with jam and clotted cream.

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  13. ROSES: A feeling?
    Was I that subtle?


    About as subtle as a horse on your foot.

    MAGO: This language is treacherous.

    Anything can become a double entendre given the right setting.

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  14. I prefer my cream tea just like Roses likes hers. However, I find that waiting for an RSVP can be somewhat time consuming, so I generally resort to a little stalking and kidnapping to speed things up.

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  15. I do like to spread mine first followed by a healthy dollop of cream. None of that squirty stuff in a can rubbish though it does have it's uses.

    I like to take my Elevenses at Betty's of York, by that time I'm usually spitting feathers for a cuppa tea. I'm also quite fond of the occasional cafetiere, the motion of pushing it down against a certain amount of resistance (but not much) brings back fond memories of Trades guesthouse in Blackpool where I used to ply my trade as a young whore.

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  16. IVD: I prefer my cream tea just like Roses likes hers. However, I find that waiting for an RSVP can be somewhat time consuming, so I generally resort to a little stalking and kidnapping to speed things up.

    In your Tardis Tea Room?

    MITZI: I do like to spread mine first followed by a healthy dollop of cream. None of that squirty stuff in a can rubbish though it does have it's uses.
    I like to take my Elevenses at Betty's of York, by that time I'm usually spitting feathers for a cuppa tea. I'm also quite fond of the occasional cafetiere, the motion of pushing it down against a certain amount of resistance (but not much) brings back fond memories of Trades guesthouse in Blackpool where I used to ply my trade as a young whore.


    Is this the place?

    I do like to spread mine

    So we’ve been told.

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  17. Mr Beastie covers his frontage with sconces... [sniggers].
    But I am more sensible, I like the cream cheese variety, generally located in Essex.
    Sx

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  18. SCARLET: Mr Beastie covers his frontage with sconces... [sniggers].
    But I am more sensible, I like the cream cheese variety, generally located in Essex.


    I misread that as Mr. Beastie was practicing frottage with scones.

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  19. Either version, I think I'm going to pass on his scones. Ugh.

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  20. Good Glory! This whole conversation is making me crave a tube steak. I don't need to know the name of the server, he just needs to deliver something that makes my mouth water.

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  21. At first, I was sooo sure of my answer, naturally it was cream first then jam. Then I thought about it and now am confused. Jam first and then cream? I can't remember! I've not had jam and scones for years now....(not a lot of tea houses in Miami, I'm afraid.....though I think the Ritz Carlton might do a high tea by the pool?!)

    And I have to say about the photo: pale BLUE stockings? ick.

    Have a great weekend, dear MJ, and may the kinks in your curls never unfurl.

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  22. I fear Miss Scarlet has confused everyone . I was explaining to her earlier that Cafe C's frontage is being revamped and the sconces have been painted gold and it looks very 'Essex', This has somehhow got addled with cheesey scones , clotted cream and wild abandoned frottage . This sort of confusion happens all the time in Devon , or so I am told. One orders a knickerbocker glory in a devonian tea room at your peril

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  23. uh oh! There's Miss J's shirt being blown up by the wind again.
    Man, she wishes a houseboy would bring her a scone, warm from the oven. Jam first, topped with a dollop of fresh cream. Not the houseboy's tho. Clotted, from a cow for these purposes.

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  24. Ah yes the very one. Just what my clack needs right now, a nice pot of tea.

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  25. A. no butterpies (george said they're horrid). B. if the cream has clotted it would be best to toss it in the bin. jam would be lovely though, as long as its imported.

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  26. I'm usually quite fond of busty wenches serving me scones, but today, I think I'll pass. The last few hours of driving made me a bit woozy. And would it kill those frizzy headed starlings to wear hair nets when they serve the scones?

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  27. SCARLET: Easily done!

    I don’t know about you, Miss Scarlet, but I’m shocked and appalled that Beast has committed frottage with an innocent scone.

    Do you think it was buttered first?

    That might explain it.

    ROSES: Either version, I think I'm going to pass on his scones. Ugh.

    You’re passing on RDJ’s scones?

    Are you unwell, Miss Roses?

    MR. COOKIE: Good Glory! This whole conversation is making me crave a tube steak. I don't need to know the name of the server, he just needs to deliver something that makes my mouth water.

    Howz about a swingin’ sirloin?

    LA DIVA CUCINA: At first, I was sooo sure of my answer, naturally it was cream first then jam. Then I thought about it and now am confused. Jam first and then cream? I can't remember! I've not had jam and scones for years now....(not a lot of tea houses in Miami, I'm afraid.....though I think the Ritz Carlton might do a high tea by the pool?!)
    And I have to say about the photo: pale BLUE stockings? ick.
    Have a great weekend, dear MJ, and may the kinks in your curls never unfurl.


    What’s worse is if she’s wearing blue eye shadow along with the blue stockings.

    BEAST: I fear Miss Scarlet has confused everyone . I was explaining to her earlier that Cafe C's frontage is being revamped and the sconces have been painted gold and it looks very 'Essex', This has somehhow got addled with cheesey scones , clotted cream and wild abandoned frottage . This sort of confusion happens all the time in Devon , or so I am told. One orders a knickerbocker glory in a devonian tea room at your peril

    Don’t try to blame this on Miss Scarlet.

    None of us would be surprised to find you committing an indecent act with a scone.

    After all, we’ve all seen what you did with a banana.

    MISS JANEY: uh oh! There's Miss J's shirt being blown up by the wind again.
    Man, she wishes a houseboy would bring her a scone, warm from the oven. Jam first, topped with a dollop of fresh cream. Not the houseboy's tho. Clotted, from a cow for these purposes.


    It would take your minds off all that fig business for a day.

    MITZI: Ah yes the very one. Just what my clack needs right now, a nice pot of tea.

    And it looks like they have a good assortment of cakes!

    KABUKI: A. no butterpies (george said they're horrid). B. if the cream has clotted it would be best to toss it in the bin. jam would be lovely though, as long as its imported.

    Mistress MJ has been informed to remove the scum from your pudding as well.

    STACIA: I'm usually quite fond of busty wenches serving me scones, but today, I think I'll pass. The last few hours of driving made me a bit woozy. And would it kill those frizzy headed starlings to wear hair nets when they serve the scones?

    Those “frizzy headed starlings” are your fellow Infomaniac bitches pausing for a refreshing cream tea.

    Perhaps your head scarf is on too tight, you poor thing.

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  28. I am chagrined, as I thought they were our servers. If only I had brought my glasses and my manners on this trip.

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  29. STACIA: I am chagrined, as I thought they were our servers. If only I had brought my glasses and my manners on this trip.

    You may borrow my lorgnette if you wish for a better view.

    Eroswings thought they were our servers as well so it appears something has gone awry in my communication to my readers.

    Is it wrong to blame the wine?

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