Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Frank and Beans
Recently, Infomaniac reported on the horrors of Todger Trauma.
We neglected to mention a common penile injury we like to call the “frank and beans incident” where your bits get stuck in your zipper.
Have you or a loved one ever got your frank and/or beans stuck in a zipper?
What to do if this happens to you?
You could apply WD-40 as pictured above, call for the Jaws of Life, or follow these simple instructions.
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Good heavens! It seems one should work in an OR to follow those instructions. And have a team of nurses on standby.
ReplyDeleteStill, what do I care. It's never happened to me.
Yes it's happened to me and I've got the scar to prove it.
ReplyDeleteHave you or a loved one ever got your frank and/or beans stuck in a zipper?
ReplyDeleteYES
What to do if this happens to you?
HOLD BACK TEARS
IVD: I’m sure it happens to your punters as they hurriedly unzip when they see you approaching the docks.
ReplyDeleteCONNIE: Show us your battle wound.
PIGGY: It’s one of the drawbacks (besides skidmarks) of your deviant pantless lifestyle.
I act like a man and just rip it free.
ReplyDeleteSome have it lucky - those with their wee mans hood still intact.
ReplyDeleteWhen it happens to 'cut' men, it's even more painful.
I know this fact.
*winces*
I said 'winces', not 'minces'.
TICKERS: Free willy!
ReplyDeletePIGGY: Did you say flounces?
Or swishes?
NO! Pfft!
ReplyDeleteZippers are made out of brass and they are no match for Steel.
Got mine caught in an escalator once, that was painful and rather embarrassing too!
ReplyDeleteNo. I said 'Struts away full of macho bravado'
ReplyDeleteSteve - Are you sure it wasn't you high heels that were caught in the escalator?
Mine's not long enough to reach the 'danger zone'
ReplyDeleteStrictly button ups for me.
ReplyDeleteA sheep tick did attach itself to my todger once. Most unpleasant.
What was your todger doing that near to a sheep? (As if we don't already know)
ReplyDeleteDid you at least buy the sheep dinner and call her the next day?
Garfer meant sheep dick.
ReplyDeleteAnd he has moved onto buttons having successfully got the hang of velcro.
Well done Garfy!
What do you do MJ,you must have a lot of experience?
It sneaked up my trouser leg (the tick, not the sheep).
ReplyDeleteAnd no, I wasn't wearing lederhosen.
We've seen photos of SID in shorts. Not a pretty sight.
hell i didn't know there were instructions...i just stood there laughing at my son...well until i fell over holding my sides...it was funny!
ReplyDeleteyup. "What do you do?"
ReplyDeletecollapse in hysterics is what I do!
Who is frank and why is he crying?
ReplyDeleteNever been around for such an incident. Would probably offer to kiss and make it better, as long as the injured was attractive and outside the bounds of consanguinuity.
ReplyDeleteelasticated waist......no problems eh...
ReplyDelete