What’s Cooking?

Now will he sit under a medlar tree,
And wish his mistress were that kind of fruit
As maids call medlars, when they laugh alone.
O Romeo, that she were, O that she were
An open-arse and thou a poperin pear!

-William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet


What’s on the menu here in this scene? Open-arse (aka medlar)? Spotted dick, perhaps? Passion fruit? Bangers and mash? Tube steak?

What’s on the menu tonight at your house?

Are you eating in or eating out?

Album Cover of the Week

“Back to the S**t” by Millie Jackson

How Clean Is Your Arse?

Is your arse minty clean?





Can you do this with confidence?...








If not, don’t come back here ‘til you have a tidy tush.








So what are you doing to ensure everyday freshness?

Smut-Free Sunday

Can’t you bitches have clean thoughts for just one day of the week?

Gay Bar Slut

Which one of you bitches is the

Filthy Friday

Arse and smut.

According to yesterday’s Infomaniac reader survey, that’s all you lot care about.






How fortuitous, then, that today should be Filthy Friday.

How’s this for smutty arse action?…







I believe it even fulfils Kaz’s “retro depravity” requirement as it looks like it’s ripped straight out of the pages of a 1970’s gay porn mag.

You bitches make me feel dirty. Like I’m your personal smut peddler.

So much for the PG-rating I was hoping to attain on this blog.

Reader Survey

With another action-packed, fun-filled year ahead of us, Infomaniac asks for your feedback on the content of this blog.

What would you like to see here in 2008?

*Suggestions welcome.


COMMENTS FROM A PREVIOUS READER SURVEY

More cock and bum fun, please.

-- Piggy and Tazzy

Yes, yes, more arse action.

-- Inexplicable DeVice

More glamour. And go-go boys!

-- CyberPete

I’d like a scratch ‘n’ sniff sticker installed on yer avatar.

-- Old Knudsen

Set up a cake trolley.

-- SID

This blog is rubbish.

-- Smunty




*Infomaniac will, as usual, ignore all advice.

Happy Birthday, Mutley!

Infomaniac starts the New Year with a birthday bang for Mutley the Dog.





Mutley comes to us all the way from a bedsit in Brodpirt - "a town of many curious customs and contradictions and currently infested with radioactive howler monkeys."

As you know, Infomaniac requires male readers to submit photographs of their bare arses. No photo? No birthday posting.

Mutley has not disappointed me. Take a look for yourself…





Mutley’s arse



Good boy, Mutley, good boy!

For being so obedient, Mistress MJ rewards you with a very special birthday pressie. The lovely Bonita…








Everyone join me in wishing a happy birthday to our Mutley!



Reminder #1: Let me know your birthday (if you haven’t already) so that you too will receive a special Infomaniac birthday posting this year.

Reminder #2: Male readers MUST submit a photo of their bare arse (hello Beast and Manuel). Photos will be published on this blog unless you request discretion. Shy fellas may rest assured that I’ll keep them for my personal viewing only.

Fasten Your Seatbelts

I intend to make it to the bottom of the bottle tonight.







On January 1st I’ll be joining SID (pictured below) in his annual New Year’s Day tradition…




The Scaling of Mount Willy


My crampons are packed and I'm ready to go.

See you back here on Wednesday, January 2nd.

Happy New Year, bitches!

Snapshot Sunday

Salacious Saturday

What with Smunty’s birthday yesterday, I neglected to post Filthy Friday. So here in its place is Salacious Saturday…

Happy Birthday, Steve!

How did he go from cute baby (though not THE cutest baby)…


Voted “Poofiest Baby” by you. And for good reason.




..to the filthy, Twinkie-loving, circus-flea-encrusted, closet-poofter that he’s become today?…





[photo via Tazzy & Piggy]


ODE TO STEVE
He’s rather cunty
We call him Smunty
He’s taken a liking
To being a Viking
His cock is bent
It pays the rent


Happy Birthday, Smunty the Cabin Boy!

Book of the Week

The Hustitute

What Are You Doing Today?

Do you have the day off like the lucky fellas pictured above?

Like them, will you get outdoors and ride the Yule Log (aka Great Ashen Faggot) or stay home and laze about?

What are you doing today, bitches?

Merry Christmas, Bitches!

Pucker up ‘cause I’m wearing my mistletoe belt buckle.





One at a time! One at a time! Don’t rush at me like a pack of hounds. There’s plenty of MJ to go around for everyone.

Merry Christmas to all my fabulous bitches.

See you back here on December 26th.

Album Cover of the Week

What’s that on the plate?

Household Hints

With the help taking time off for the holidays, I’m forced to do the housework myself.

So I’m enlisting you bitches to submit your best household tips for cleaning a home from top to bottom.

For example, I heard that to clean the caulking around the bathtub, you should fill a spray bottle with Smirnoff Vodka, spray the caulking, wait five minutes, and wash the tub clean.

Well, you know where this story’s going. I got more Vodka in me than in the tub, therefore no more housework was accomplished for the rest of the day.

You can see I need some assistance here.

*considers serving copious amounts of alcohol to guests so they don’t notice the dust bunnies*

Shoppenboys

Want to buy clothes for your man but he won’t tag along to the shops with you?

Try a Shoppenboy!



Les Shoppenboys (they’re French) wander around the store in red boxer shorts until a customer asks them to try on an item of clothing.

Customers select the Shoppenboy who best fits their man’s body type and the Shoppenboy will model the clothes for size.

Here’s a video clip for those of you wishing to see a Shoppenboy shakin’ his stuff. Readers most likely to view the clip of Shoppenboy Laurent dancing in his knickers include IVD, CyberPete and Smunty the Cabin Boy.

The rest of you may opt instead to go about your preparations for the holidays.

Filthy Friday - The Crimbo Edition

I was all set to post a pic of a run-of-the-mill floppy willy or a garden-variety diseased minge here today. That is until Beast put the pressure on to post a Crimbo-themed Filthy Friday pic. So here it is…





Right. It’s not all that filthy on the surface so I’ll leave it up to your deviant little minds to tell us what’s really going on in this winter wonderland scene.

Happy Birthday, SID!

Happy Birthday, you filthy Irish bastard!


They said it was baby fat. They said he’d grow out of it.




Fast forward to adulthood…




A grown-up, blimpish, Brobdingnagian SID was the inspiration for Mr. Stay Puft from the movie Ghostbusters.




Why, you ask, am I such a devoted SIDophile?


Is it his fat, lumpy, wobbly arse?





Dead sexy




Is it his bald patch?




Patch is partially concealed by this product.




Is it his man boobs?
(Click the link above to see his moobs…I dare not post them again lest sensitive viewers regurgitate.)


Is it my beloved "Wee SID?"



Is it his Rebel Without A Cause attitude as he speeds down the motorway?






Yes, it’s all of the above but it’s SO much more. So much more that space doesn’t allow but I’ll let you in on a secret.

I love the way SID fills out a nappy…
















Balloon dance optional





“Wee SID” lights up in celebration



Everyone help yourselves to cake while I blow out the candle!!!






Happy Birthday to our Stupid Irish Daddy.

First round's on me. Sláinte!