(logo created by and awarded to LX)
And you think being sent to the Oubliette is punishment?
The following is a partial list of offences and reasons YOU could be banned for life here on Infomaniac:
Wearing offensive footwear, particularly CROCS.
Mentioning Celine Dion.
Asking "Did I win yet?" too many times.
Ignoring contest deadlines.
Not using a towel on the furniture whilst nekkid.
Emitting bodily fluids, especially vomit.
Failure to submit a photo of your backside to our Gallery of Alluring Arses.
Voting Republican.
p.s. LX has not committed ALL these offences but he has committed enough to deserve the "Banned By Infomaniac" notification.
ReplyDeletep.s. The ban has been temporarily lifted on LX but he is on probation.
ReplyDeleteAm I banned yet?
ReplyDelete*adds that question to list of offences*
DeleteUnfotunately, I cannot give LX an A for French spelling!
DeleteHUGGY JON: UnFOtunately, Mistress MJ cannot give YOU an A for ENGLISH spelling!
DeleteLX is American and gets points for effort, unlike many Canadians, n’est-ce pas?
Of course... I was being facetious!
DeleteTroublemaker!
Delete@ Jon: If there is a spelling or grammatical error, what is it? I can easily revise the graphic. If The Mistress is going to be spreading these around like herpes, let's get it right!
DeletePoints deducted for suggesting I have a social disease.
DeleteSo your flexibility also allows you to bend the rules...
ReplyDeletePRINNY: I bend over backwards for you Bitches and this is the thanks I get.
Delete*fanning mahself* you know, sweetpea, i had a pair of sandals made by those people, but out of fear, i have not worn them since learning of y'all's distaste for the brand. sweet mary sunshine, wtf has happened to me? i used to be such a badass..*sigh*
ReplyDeletexoxoxoxox
SAVANNAH: That’s my gal.
DeleteBut LX is a favorite around here. Next you'll ban wrinkly nekkid old men and Ikea monkeys.
ReplyDeleteI may have become an embarrassment to the IKEA Monkey.
Deletebut do you have a shearling jacket, sweet pea? xoxoxo
DeleteAs a matter of fact, yes I do!
DeleteYou best watch out AyeM8y, next thing you know she'll be stripping you of your naked bartending title. Then where will I be...I mean....we be, without that lovely swizzle stick of yours.
DeleteGood gods! There'll hardly be anyone left here, will there?
ReplyDeleteoh please Mr Device, with events like Ménage à Trois of the Month, Testicle Tuesday, Filthy Fridays , contest galore a vodka fountain, and a newly installed chapel, I don't see anyone leaving this dump.
Delete*Surfaces* You forgot the gincuzzi, honey! Hic! Jx
Deletejust remember that, "BANNED IN BOSTON"
ReplyDeleteonly made whatever was banned that much
more desirable.
"would someone pull those klieg
lights over here and shine them on LX?"
I gotta wear shades!
DeleteOnce a month she has this "thinning the herd" attitude ...
ReplyDelete*presents “Banned By Infomaniac” notification to Mago.
DeleteFOREGIVENESS!
DeleteSee this, but not Orlando.
The ban is officially lifted for Mago.
DeletePosts about and/or links to cute animal photos are your "get out of jail free" card.
That means Norma is safe too...THIS week, anyway.
I have "a friend" who has committed all of those infractions, except for one!
ReplyDeleteLX: Are you going to tell us which one?
Deletewell, Mj, with all these commenters, there seems to be quite a few asses missing from your gallery. What if someone submits a photo on their naked ass whilst sitting on crocs?
ReplyDelete... vomiting. With a Celine Dion tattoo.
Delete...and an "I Love Mitt Romney" sticker.
DeleteMissing asses from the Gallery?
DeleteFortunately for all of you, one Infomaniac Bitch has found a way to placate Mistress MJ.
More about that later.
I just had to make sure I said crocs and not something else. I getting more ill by the minute with this language......where the gin Jon?
ReplyDeleteAnd another thing, if I sit naked on your furniture, I refuse to sit on a towel....at least till I take a blue light to it.
ReplyDeleteMISTRESS MADDIE: No need for a blue light.
DeleteYou can see the stains from space.
Chris Hadfield tweeted them.
Can we mention Justin Bieber?
ReplyDeleteHUGGY JON: Justin Bieber may be mentioned (in hushed tones) ONLY if he is being upstaged by the IKEA monkey.
DeleteGracious, the old thing really is in a mood, isn't she? I think instead of a ban graphic, we should dig up a CRAMP ALERT gif for her. For all our sakes.
ReplyDelete*presents “Banned By Infomaniac” notification to Mr. Peenee.
Deletejesus, a person can't say anything here.
DeleteDemerit points for taking the name of our Lord in vain.
Deletedemerit points?
Deletewhat the fuck is this, summer camp?
NORMA: Summer camp, winter camp...whatever.
DeleteCamp is camp no matter WHAT the season!
*cues entrance by British Jon*
No idea what you're talking about, dear... Jx
DeleteJON: Now THAT'S what I'm talking about.
Deletecamp- it is all we have left, right?
DeleteNORMA: ♫is that all there is?♫
Deleteoh sure, banish us AND send us into the
Deletedarkness crying over schmaltzy peggy lee.
Celine Dion wears crocs..?
ReplyDeleteOoops, I almost banned Wally, I was in such a mood.
DeleteMistress MJ will be please to know that I gave back my crocs to whom they belong!
ReplyDeleteHuggy Jon is just one offence away from receiving a "Banned By Infomaniac" notification.
DeleteMistress, will this get me out of trouble?
ReplyDeleteLX: What were you saying about being banned by Infomaniac?
DeleteI seem to have forgotten.
Was I dreaming?