Mistress MJ hopes to spend the day catching up with your blogs and flipping through the new IKEA catalogue...
[via]
UPDATE: Change of plan. Must go to work. So much for a relaxing day. Catch you later, Bitches!
Thursday, December 13, 2012
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I'll have a STRÅLA KVÖRTAL monkey, please.
ReplyDeleteyou know you're gonna have to put it together yourself?
DeleteAnd, of course one of the monkey's parts is missing, but it still manages to swipe your cake off your plate, and climbs to the top of the Billy Bookcase, peeing all the way.
DeleteI have a drawer filled with those little IKEA wrenches. The monkey can play with those.
DeleteOr is it, you have a monkey in your drawers?
DeleteWhat! Suddenly the Infomaniac Home Shopping Network is not good enough for you?
ReplyDeleteMJ... Have you gone to the Dark Side?
More like the underside....she is always "under" the rich and famous.
DeleteThose Billy bookshelves are indestructible. Dammit :) xoxox
ReplyDeleteonce upon a time, i was obsessed with ikea.
ReplyDeleteand yes, i too brought my minky with me.
Rumor has it they may start carrying Mj's favorite shoe-crocs! Those bastards. Oh lord....* running to bring MJ the smelling salts*
ReplyDeleteUPDATE: Mistress MJ fell back to sleep after posting this.
ReplyDeleteWith every intention of visiting your blogs upon awakening, she got a call saying she has work awaiting.
So hi ho hi ho (ho hum) it's off to work I go.
I'll catch up with you Bitches later.
The monkey put an IKEA wrench in your toilet while you were at work. Use the Unisex Restroom before you leave the workplace.
DeleteI'm feeling a little peckish, let's have a look on the menu .
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the "Drake & Josh" epi in which an evil exotic monkey buyer tried to boil, and eat, their pet monkey. Did anyone see that epi?
DeleteDoes the monkey have that smell that all other Ikea products have?
ReplyDeleteIs that what those meatballs are made of?
ReplyDeleteYes, keep chewing, and do not spit it out.
DeleteWhat happens at 2995?
ReplyDeleteSx
Here MJ... This might help you out with your perusing...
ReplyDeleteMonkeys are the entire reason I no longer shop at Ikea.
ReplyDelete......the monkeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeys
Live monkey brain......
ReplyDeleteThat Piggy who I didn't have the honour to know, was right. You bitches are simply a bunch of cunts. All of ya!
*rushes to the bathroom... can't make it... throws up in the vodka fountain*
Speaking of vomiting (and Piggy often did in response to my posts,) Mistress MJ is feeling poorly and must take to her bed.
ReplyDeleteRest assured that she is about to post something new for you, to keep you entertained in her absence.
[fluffs pillows]
Delete[tiptoes out]
I had a terribly violent reaction to Ikea, akin to anaphylactic shock, after someone bequeathed me a horrible Ikea sofa: it was a mint-green, two-seater, very scratchy. I was away in Cape Town and arrived home to find it planted in my West Wing. A horrible thing, the sort of object one finds in nursing homes in seaside resorts on the south coast of England.
ReplyDeleteForgive me if I post a link to the horror-filled entry on my own blog, when I discovered this Ikea monstrosity in my house:
http://fannylove-uk.blogspot.co.uk/2012/02/when-cats-away.html
You have my deepest sympathy to this Ikea affliction.
Fanny xx
It is always a shock, Miss Fanny, to find large objects implanted in your west wing.
Delete