Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Transsexual Truck Stop

Once you’ve made a wrong turn off the highway exit ramp, they’ll make sure you never find your way back …


(click to enlarge)

A word of warning.

No matter how backed up you are, don’t go in the ladies’ room! …

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40 comments:

  1. TJB10:59 PM, November 30, 2009

    Actually, on my first visit to my very first gay bar, my ill-advised trip to the loo provided me with a sight not terribly unlike the one shown here. Which probably explains why I drink. Heavily.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The Mistress11:15 PM, November 30, 2009

    TJB: Actually, on my first visit to my very first gay bar, my ill-advised trip to the loo provided me with a sight not terribly unlike the one shown here. Which probably explains why I drink. Heavily.

    Sadly, my favourite dive gay bar has been renovated and gone upscale.

    The ladies’ room only had standing room for three people maximum to stand in line waiting for the ONE stall.

    Well you can imagine how many bitches with full bladders were waiting for that one stall.

    So the trannies used to piss in the sink if the toilet was occupied!

    Oh the memories.

    And speaking of memories, when are you going to publish your memoir?

    ReplyDelete
  3. TJB11:18 PM, November 30, 2009

    Speaking of pissing in the sink (and since you spotlighted Shelley Winters a few posts back), try this one on for size: an ex-friend of mine was program director at a radio station in upstate NY. Miss Shelley Winters was a guest on some talk radio show; she was very friendly and affable, but completely bat-sh*t crazy and a little disoriented. She used the ladies' room before leaving the station, and the employees discovered that the befuddled Miss Winters had left them a "gift" in the sink.

    And I'm not publishing my memoirs, because I haven't done anything as colorful as that. Yet.

    ReplyDelete
  4. The Mistress11:24 PM, November 30, 2009

    TJB: You can begin your memoir (you WILL write it) by telling us why the radio program director is your EX-friend!

    And of course include the batshit Shelley Winters story!

    We just need to get you a little tipsy to get more dirt for the memoir.

    ReplyDelete
  5. TJB11:30 PM, November 30, 2009

    I'll skip the writing part and jump right to the Broadway musicalization of it. Hugh Jackman will star, of course, because the resemblance is uncanny; he's got a proven track record in musical theatre; and he really needs another opportunity to thank "his lovely wife Deborah" during his inevitable Tony acceptance speech.

    ReplyDelete
  6. The Mistress11:35 PM, November 30, 2009

    TJB: Hugh Jackman?

    Is Harvey Fierstein busy?

    I’ll skip the Broadway musicalization and wait for the sock puppet revue.

    ReplyDelete
  7. TJB11:44 PM, November 30, 2009

    Is Harvey Fierstein busy?

    Yes. With Hugh Jackman.

    ReplyDelete
  8. LẌ11:47 PM, November 30, 2009

    Don't bogart that TP roll, my friend.
    Pass it over to me.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous11:49 PM, November 30, 2009

    Thanks for the nightmares this is going to bring me!

    ReplyDelete
  10. The Mistress11:56 PM, November 30, 2009

    TJB: Is Harvey Fierstein busy?
    Yes. With Hugh Jackman.

    *affects Neil Patrick Harris voice*

    This show
    Could not be any gayer
    If Liza was named mayor
    And Elton John took flight
    The curtain falls
    I'm off to hit some big Tony balls
    Goodnight

    XL: Don't bogart that TP roll, my friend.
    Pass it over to me.

    Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you!

    MICHAEL RIVERS: Thanks for the nightmares this is going to bring me!

    In your dreams!

    ReplyDelete
  11. eroswings12:24 AM, December 01, 2009

    It's the full servicing station where the customers come first!



    You're going to need another roll to take off all that paint!

    ReplyDelete
  12. ayeM8y12:32 AM, December 01, 2009

    Oh thank you MJ for the shout out. My little Tranny Truck Stop needs all the advertising it can get. It’s a little off the beaten path, but once you find it we’ll make it worth the beatin’.

    ReplyDelete
  13. The Mistress12:40 AM, December 01, 2009

    EROS: It's the full servicing station where the customers come first!
    You're going to need another roll to take off all that paint!

    Oh so you’ve been there, have you?

    AYEM8Y: Oh thank you MJ for the shout out. My little Tranny Truck Stop needs all the advertising it can get. It’s a little off the beaten path, but once you find it we’ll make it worth the beatin’.

    *notes jaunty Santa cap*

    So this is where you filmed ‘Truck Stop Trollop’!

    And let’s take this golden opportunity to flog your book… “Mean Dirty Pirate’s Definitive Truck Stop Guide.”

    Do you have anything else in the works?

    ReplyDelete
  14. ayeM8y12:53 AM, December 01, 2009

    Well I’ve been licking my way up and down the highways so often lately that I’ve thought about writing a compendium of the Mean Dirty Pirate’s Dirty Lick Spots. Welcome Centers, Roadside Attractions, Landmarks, Monuments, Rest Areas, Public Restrooms, Parks, and the generally cruisey places where queers go to have anonymous empty meaningless sex. You know, where straight men go to get away from their wives to be gay. I’ve decided to include a new star rating system and GPS navigation instructions.

    ReplyDelete
  15. The Mistress12:57 AM, December 01, 2009

    AYEM8Y: May we be so bold as to suggest a title?

    “Lick Your Way Across the USA”

    ReplyDelete
  16. CyberPete1:07 AM, December 01, 2009

    Is that Chi Chi Larues sistah?

    ReplyDelete
  17. Roses2:50 AM, December 01, 2009

    I think s/he should start taking two bottles in the shower, one being industrial strength conditioner.

    Look at the split endz!

    And her roots need doing.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Michael Guy6:15 AM, December 01, 2009

    Well somebody already cracked the DIOR 'colors for Christmas' gift set, I see...

    ReplyDelete
  19. The Mistress7:57 AM, December 01, 2009

    CYBERPOOF: Is that Chi Chi Larues sistah?

    It’s her dear old dad.

    ROSES: I think s/he should start taking two bottles in the shower, one being industrial strength conditioner.
    Look at the split endz!
    And her roots need doing.

    She needs a Bobbi!

    MICHAEL GUY: Well somebody already cracked the DIOR 'colors for Christmas' gift set, I see...

    All 250 colours in the collection!

    ReplyDelete
  20. KAZ8:33 AM, December 01, 2009

    After AYEM8Y's mistake the other day I shall be making that my local.

    ReplyDelete
  21. The Mistress9:16 AM, December 01, 2009

    KAZ: After AYEM8Y's mistake the other day I shall be making that my local.

    You ability to drink men under the table is why Ayem8y mistook you for a man.

    To make up for this oversight, Ayem8y wants you to have a front row seat at his Truck Stop Fall Fashion Preview.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Romeo Morningwood9:21 AM, December 01, 2009

    Don't get strung out by the way She looks
    Don't judge a book by it's coverrrr

    I'm not much of a man by the light of day
    But by night I'm one hell of a loverrrrr

    Is this place in Penisylavania?

    ReplyDelete
  23. ayeM8y9:23 AM, December 01, 2009

    Sorry KAZ confusing your gender was a huge fox paw!

    Forgive me?

    I could rest on the fact that I often confuse my pronouns but that wouldn’t do, would it?

    In my defense, I perceive the spelling of (KAZ) with a Z to be masculine and your avatar of Patsy (Eurydice Colette Clytemnestra Dido Bathsheba Rabelais Patricia Cocteau Stone) to be one that many homosexuals and drag queens favor and use frequently.

    I shall take more time to familiarize myself with the vast membership that comprises, INFOMANIAC, their sexuality and their genders.

    A huge undertaking.

    Let me start,

    Hello I’m AYEM8Y, I’m male and I’m gay.

    ReplyDelete
  24. The Mistress9:31 AM, December 01, 2009

    DONN: Don't get strung out by the way She looks
    Don't judge a book by it's coverrrr
    I'm not much of a man by the light of day
    But by night I'm one hell of a loverrrrr

    Is this place in Penisylavania?

    Yes, at the corner of Cumming Street and Seaman Avenue.

    AYEM8Y: Sorry KAZ confusing your gender was a huge fox paw!
    Forgive me?
    I could rest on the fact that I often confuse my pronouns but that wouldn’t do, would it?
    In my defense, I perceive the spelling of (KAZ) with a Z to be masculine and your avatar of Patsy (Eurydice Colette Clytemnestra Dido Bathsheba Rabelais Patricia Cocteau Stone) to be one that many homosexuals and drag queens favor and use frequently.
    I shall take more time to familiarize myself with the vast membership that comprises, INFOMANIAC, their sexuality and their genders.
    A huge undertaking.
    Let me start,
    Hello I’m AYEM8Y, I’m male and I’m gay.

    OMG!...You’re GAY?

    ReplyDelete
  25. ayeM8y9:37 AM, December 01, 2009

    “OMG!...You’re GAY?”

    *Let the hail of stone throwing begin*

    ReplyDelete
  26. The Mistress9:41 AM, December 01, 2009

    AYEM8Y: “OMG!...You’re GAY?”
    *Let the hail of stone throwing begin*

    Do you mind if we stuff dollar bills in your butt bra instead?

    ReplyDelete
  27. LẌ9:52 AM, December 01, 2009

    I am the victim of gender confusion all the time ... even worse on the Internet! [rim shot]

    ReplyDelete
  28. The Mistress10:09 AM, December 01, 2009

    XL: I am the victim of gender confusion all the time ... even worse on the Internet! [rim shot]

    Hence the question on your sidebar…

    “What is your gender?”

    Well? You haven’t answered the question!

    ReplyDelete
  29. ayeM8y10:18 AM, December 01, 2009

    “What is your gender?”

    Well? You haven’t answered the question!

    Wouldn’t it be nice to have an “INFOMANIAC Cum Clean Day”

    Where all the board members announce who they are and what they are, and of course just to cum.

    ReplyDelete
  30. The Mistress10:20 AM, December 01, 2009

    AYEMY: “What is your gender?”
    Well? You haven’t answered the question!
    Wouldn’t it be nice to have an “INFOMANIAC Cum Clean Day”
    Where all the board members announce who they are and what they are, and of course just to cum.

    *scribbles note in margin*

    Consider it done.

    Cumming soon on Infomaniac.

    ReplyDelete
  31. LẌ10:28 AM, December 01, 2009

    “INFOMANIAC Cum Clean Day”

    I hope it's not anti-climatic!

    ReplyDelete
  32. The Mistress10:36 AM, December 01, 2009

    XL: “INFOMANIAC Cum Clean Day”
    I hope it's not anti-climatic!

    Not another word about it.

    Look forward to more later this week.

    ReplyDelete
  33. CyberPete11:53 AM, December 01, 2009

    Curious, very curious..

    ReplyDelete
  34. LaDivaCucina1:39 PM, December 01, 2009

    Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!! Tragic on so many levels!!

    ReplyDelete
  35. Anonymous2:13 PM, December 01, 2009

    I think I just had an accident.

    ReplyDelete
  36. KAZ3:08 PM, December 01, 2009

    It's OK AYEM8Y - trannies get more respect round here than mere hetero women of a certain age.
    Clytemnestra - yeah

    ReplyDelete
  37. Manuel6:08 PM, December 01, 2009

    insert Knudsen comment here....


    heh

    ReplyDelete
  38. Mitzi 6:37 PM, December 01, 2009

    The look on her face suggests she is passing a boulder, that's why she's gripping the bog roll and using it as a bite staff. When faced with a difficult one, it may help, if you faced the cistern and push down onto the lid until delivery.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Anonymous6:47 PM, December 01, 2009

    This is all very disturbing... very disturbing indeed. I mean who chooses white loo roll? Turquoise every time - blends nicely...

    ReplyDelete
  40. The Mistress9:14 PM, December 01, 2009

    CYBERPOOF: Curious, very curious..

    Isn’t it.

    LA DIVA CUCINA: Ahhhhhhhhhh!!!! Tragic on so many levels!!

    Then pick just one level and lower your stress.

    RANDOM CHICK: I think I just had an accident.

    Was it a slurry-related accident?

    See previous post.

    KAZ: It's OK AYEM8Y - trannies get more respect round here than mere hetero women of a certain age.
    Clytemnestra - yeah

    Is this our cue for a Rodney Dangerfield joke?

    MANUEL: insert Knudsen comment here....
    heh

    He’s too busy with his gurlyboys to comment.

    MITZI: The look on her face suggests she is passing a boulder, that's why she's gripping the bog roll and using it as a bite staff. When faced with a difficult one, it may help, if you faced the cistern and push down onto the lid until delivery.

    We shall pass this information on to our readers.

    Thank you for this beneficial public service announcement.

    MUTLEY: This is all very disturbing... very disturbing indeed. I mean who chooses white loo roll? Turquoise every time - blends nicely...

    If you insist.

    ReplyDelete

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