Thursday, March 13, 2008

Take a Lesbian to Lunch



Today is “Take a Lesbian to Lunch Day.”

Let us know how you get on.
Posted by at
Labels: ,

38 comments:

  1. nwtrunner2:30 AM, March 13, 2008

    Mmmmmmm - good idea MJ!

    Gotta go through my little black book now looking for lesbians....

    ReplyDelete
  2. BEAST3:20 AM, March 13, 2008

    and what shall we have
    Fish Pie ????
    Fish Fingers????

    ReplyDelete
  3. Inexplicable DeVice3:32 AM, March 13, 2008

    Take a lesbian to lunch? Are you out of your mind?!?
    Where, apart from a dirty, filthy trucker's cafe, would one be able to entertain a female Geoff Capes complete with the fighting and furniture smashing?
    Certainly not somewhere that I'd frequent.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Old Knudsen4:00 AM, March 13, 2008

    Leezers can sure eat, I hear they like to munch on rugs.


    Why would I pay for a meal for a woman and not get any sex out of it?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous4:43 AM, March 13, 2008

    You hoping for a lunch invite then MJ?

    ReplyDelete
  6. KAZ4:45 AM, March 13, 2008

    But (obviously) I'm the femmme type so I'm waiting for a butch type to take me to lunch.
    Perhaps I'll pop over to Hebden Bridge and wait for an offer.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Daisy6:43 AM, March 13, 2008

    the demands you continually put on me...geez...now i have to take a someone to lunch...ffs...next i will have to "have a nice day"...where does the madness end?

    ReplyDelete
  8. Geoff8:08 AM, March 13, 2008

    She drank all my beer!

    ReplyDelete
  9. garfer8:51 AM, March 13, 2008

    I hear that lesbians are nice on toast with gherkins and a splash of Tabasco.

    ReplyDelete
  10. The Mistress9:00 AM, March 13, 2008

    NWT: And what if they all say they’re having “Nunavut”?

    BEAST: Fish taco.

    IVD: Isn’t there a canteen down at the docks where you take you sailor “friends”?

    KNUDSEN: Carpet munchers get more fibre in their diet, that’s for sure.

    CONNIE: Get back to work.

    KAZ: You can’t throw a stone without hitting a lesbian in Hebden Bridge.

    DAISY: I’ll send you my CD.

    Listen to the subliminal messages while you sleep and soon you’ll be mine, all mine.

    *maniacal laff*

    GEOFF: I’m assuming it was Mr. Mutley’s choice of beer: Old Lesbian No.6 - "a delicious beetroot-coloured ale fermented on the thighs of dusky Cuban maidens."

    Mutley says “it is made entirely at the St Colostomy Brewery in downtown Redruth.”

    GARFY: Use those gherkins, or “cornichons” if you’re feeling Continental, to make a rémoulade which you’ll find is a tasty accompaniment to seafood dishes.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Tickersoid9:45 AM, March 13, 2008

    Although you can't throw a bowl of tomato soup in any direction in Pontnewynydd without violating a lesbian, I have to say, I've never taken one out to lunch. Should I and why?

    ReplyDelete
  12. Peevish McSnark9:46 AM, March 13, 2008

    Only one? I think we'll go for oysters.

    ReplyDelete
  13. The Mistress10:04 AM, March 13, 2008

    TICKERS: Don't ask questions. Just do it.

    Have you learned nothing during your visits here?

    PEEVISH: Help yourself to the bearded clams.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Romeo Morningwood11:48 AM, March 13, 2008

    I have on many occasions but only for hotdogs and an ice cream cone..
    which I prefer to watch being consumed for some reason and I might add, the irony is not lost on my guest either.

    ReplyDelete
  15. The Mistress12:15 PM, March 13, 2008

    DONN: You should see FN eat a corn dog.

    ReplyDelete
  16. INNER VOICES1:32 PM, March 13, 2008

    well the books shoes that they both smoke and wear red lipstick... shall we go to the strip club then? i hear the have a great burger!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Billy1:34 PM, March 13, 2008

    Only if the lesbian takes me out next week.

    I could be in with a shout if she's a Lesbian (i.e. from Lesbos)

    ReplyDelete
  18. The Mistress1:53 PM, March 13, 2008

    VOICES: Or you could all picnic up on your skylight.

    BILLY: She'll get you sozzled on Pramnian Lesbian wine.

    ReplyDelete
  19. CyberPete1:59 PM, March 13, 2008

    I'd rather not

    I can't help but worry that one could catch it

    Oh the horror!

    ReplyDelete
  20. INNER VOICES2:16 PM, March 13, 2008

    hmmm... i could mount a nice poll on which to hold onto atop the sky light... any takers? mj needs a dance partner...

    ReplyDelete
  21. BEAST2:26 PM, March 13, 2008

    I have eaten mousaka in the exact place that Sapho Queen of the Lesbians landed with an unpleasant splat after throwing herself from the cliffs of vaissiliki for un requited love......does that count ???

    ReplyDelete
  22. The Mistress2:59 PM, March 13, 2008

    CYBERPOOF: You are much too gurly to ever have to worry about that, dear.

    VOICES: We don’t have any nice Poles who visit this blog.

    Oh wait. There’s Tony in Hebden Bridge but I’m not sure he’d want you to mount him.

    BEAST: It only counts if you were wearing Birkenstocks at the time and listening to The Best of Melissa Etheridge.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Jenny3:07 PM, March 13, 2008

    I'm having sushi for lunch. Does that count?

    ReplyDelete
  24. Old Knudsen3:39 PM, March 13, 2008

    I fancy a pink taco meself.

    ReplyDelete
  25. The Mistress3:48 PM, March 13, 2008

    BOXER: It only counts if you were wearing Knudsen's cap while you ate it.

    Like THAT'll ever happen!

    KNUDSEN: Will you provide the special sauce?

    Boxer will give you a bite of her tuna roll if you let her wear your cap.

    ReplyDelete
  26. CyberPete3:54 PM, March 13, 2008

    Then point me to the nearest lesbienne

    lesbiennes love me

    ReplyDelete
  27. INNER VOICES4:20 PM, March 13, 2008

    well, no lesbian lunch for me then... does anybody want a bite of my lickalottapuss sandwich? i'll be up on the roof.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Jenny5:04 PM, March 13, 2008

    mean. so mean. A girl can dream. But I don't have to work that hard for it... I just need to wait for him to croak.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Miss Smuggersham5:15 PM, March 13, 2008

    *sigh* I'm broke and sadly can't take any lesbians out to lunch. Can I just take a packed lunch and we can eat it together?

    ReplyDelete
  30. The Mistress5:58 PM, March 13, 2008

    CYBERPOOF: They just want you for your gayer cake.

    VOICES: Knudsen might want a bite of your kebab.

    BOXER: One of his 125 grandchildren will inherit the cap.

    Maybe he’ll adopt you.

    T-BIRD: Haven’t you learned by now that there’s no such thing as a free lunch?

    ReplyDelete
  31. INNER VOICES6:36 PM, March 13, 2008

    only if i get his cap!

    ReplyDelete
  32. Manuel9:21 PM, March 13, 2008

    yeah but book in advance......

    ReplyDelete
  33. ellie9:35 PM, March 13, 2008

    I'm dining out on my Golden Blog Award this weekend I shall do lesbian lunch next week, are you busy then MJ sweetheart

    ReplyDelete
  34. Eddie Waring10:06 PM, March 13, 2008

    All our Human Resources staff were in a training class so I duct taped my dick between my legs and went to McDonalds for a Filet 'o' Fish...it was a treat.

    ReplyDelete
  35. The Mistress10:46 PM, March 13, 2008

    VOICES: You’ll have to get into the ring with Boxer.

    MANUEL: At least they won’t show any interest in your sugarloaf.

    ELLIE: We’ll arrange something privately away from Knudsen’s prying eyes.

    I don’t mind him watching us eat out but it’s the tea brewing for him later that vexes me so.

    EDDIE: Is there nothing duct tape can't do?

    I hope you shaved first or it’s going to hurt like a bitch getting it off.

    ReplyDelete
  36. eroswings10:42 AM, March 15, 2008

    Can I take them out next Friday instead? When the Pope says it's appropriate to eat fish and not meat?

    ReplyDelete
  37. GoBetty3:04 PM, March 19, 2008

    ALL: I am free for lunches, dinners, etc.

    ReplyDelete
  38. The Mistress3:22 PM, March 19, 2008

    BINGOWINGS: Oh goodness I forgot to tell you that YES, you can.

    GOBETTY: NOW you tell us!

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)