Monday, July 21, 2008
Fly Me To The Moon
Today’s posting was inspired by Belfast’s finest waiter, Manuel, who wrote about noisy neighbours here.
There's no doubt that noise complaints are a major cause of neighbourhood disputes.
Last year, for example, an Australian man was shot dead when he asked his neighbour to turn down his loud music.
I’m sure many of you can identify with the problem of neighbours from hell.
Well now there’s a solution!
For a mere $24 U.S. plus shipping (£12 ), you can receive the deed to an acre of land on the moon.
Dennis Hope of the Lunar Embassy claims to have found a loophole in international law allowing him to claim full sovereignty of the moon.
Hope claims to be selling 1,500 lunar properties a day.
He allocates land by simply closing his eyes and pointing to a map of the Moon.
He’s already made a whopping 9 million dollars from sales (£4.5m).
So what’s in it for you, beloved Infomaniac readers?
Well, since sound doesn't travel on the moon, you'd never hear your noisy neighbours.
But you know what that means...
In space, no one can hear you scream.
Can you hear me, Major Tom?
Buy now.
You'd have to be a lunatic to pass up this opportunity.
How much to send my neighbors to the moon?
ReplyDeleteI think I'm a lunatic then. But I'm with Eroswings...let's all send our cranky neighbors to the moon!
ReplyDeleteThat's 'um'possible! Bill Gates bought the Moon from GE last month and he never told me about any lots for sale?
ReplyDeleteLet's face it Microsoft sends us updates every fifteen f*cking minutes so you'd think that they might have mentioned this.
On MANswers today (spike TV) they said that a human being could only last 1 1/2 minutes in space before exploding outside of our 14psi atomosphere..is that true?
Sounds a stoopid idea to me , How am I going to get home from work ???
ReplyDeleteHowever in a bizar coincedence I find regularly mooning my neighbours tends to keep them away :-)
Apparently 8 out of 10 people in Denmark feel that their neighbours sexual escapades ruin their sleep.
ReplyDeleteNo one has ever been to the moon so how can you........... oh I see yer back on the crack again, well keep sniffing.
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't get suckered into this, people. When the moon's rightful owners come back, there'll be all kinds of Hells to pay.
ReplyDeleteAnd they've only popped out to the local shops - They could be back any time now!
With my luck I'd get the guy on the right with the fish bowl on his head.
ReplyDeleteMind you - perhaps he's Dennis Hope - that would be OK.
Angela has her block already. Apparently it overlooks the Sea of Tranquility. Astute buy he he * big smile * the agent says that prices there have just skyrocketed lately.
ReplyDeleteAs I already own substantial estates on Venus on Mars I have no interest in purchasing a puny plot on a barren lump like the moon.
ReplyDeleteIt's very dull and you can't even get a decent cocktail.
Mare Tranquillitatis 15. Guests not welcome.
ReplyDeletethe moon eh.......at last reading this blog finally pays off.......hehehehehe
ReplyDeleteEROS & RANDOM: Send me your credit card details and I’ll take care of your neighbours.
ReplyDeleteWIZENHEIMER: Slice TV says it’s only the men that can’t last any decent length of time without exploding.
BEAST: Your uncontrollable flatulence keeps the neighbours away too!
CYBERPOOF: You’re the 1 in 10 Danes upset because his neighbours (unlike him) are having sex, period.
KNUDSEN:
I've hawked all my yesterdays
Don't try and change my tune
'Cause I thought I heard a saxophone
I'm drunk on the moon
IVD: I suppose they’ve popped out to the corner shop to buy moon pies?
KAZ: You’ll get the man in the moon.
ReplyDeleteANGELA: I’m over the moon that you’ve dropped in.
Behave yourself. I’m watching you.
GARFY: Isn’t there a golf course on the moon?
Astronaut Alan Sheppard whacked a few golf balls up there.
And surely there must be a Ferengi bar.
MAGO: I’d say “See you on the dark side of the moon” but it appears I’m not welcome.
MANUEL: I came this close to posting a pic of your full moon again.
Planet Earth is blue and there's nothing I can do.
ReplyDeleteGEOFF: You can take your protein pills and put your helmet on, for starters.
ReplyDeleteNo, I'm one in the 10 in 10 who are upset with their neighbours period.
ReplyDeleteWith my luck, he would pick a lot for me in the middle of a trailer park.
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: You sound a little cranky today.
ReplyDeletePeriod?
XL: Unlike here on Earth, you’d be safe in a trailer park as there are no tornadoes on the moon.
I think I'll wait for the foreclosures deals and save some money ... I'm sure it won't be long from now.
ReplyDeleteJOE: Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are moving to the moon.
ReplyDelete...the problem being, thats where my freak neighbors ARE FROM.
ReplyDeleteof course now that i think about it, i could go there and I'd be the freak neighbor!
"Oh my god that annoying womans' mowing her lawn again! I can't hear the voices in my head telling me to kill the pope!"
NATIONS: May I suggest turning your toilet planter into a porcelain space ship?
ReplyDeleteCover it in tin foil to match your hat!
There is space on my moon if anyone is interested!
ReplyDeleteHONKEIE2: Welcome to Infomaniac!
ReplyDeleteWhere did you come from? Outer space?
Are you woman, man or mutant?
I'll stop by tonight after work to see if you have a blog or just a very large lunar landing pad.
It's a combination of that and my Internet not working every second minute
ReplyDeleteI'd like to go to Mars. Is anyone giving that away?
ReplyDeleteoooo... mj is going to stop by the honkeie2's place later to check out his lunar landing pad......
ReplyDeleteCYBERPOOF: Oh you poor thing.
ReplyDeleteInternet probs push me over the edge.
BILLY: You want property on Mars?
You're in luck!
VOICES: Have we confirmed that Honkeie2's a guy?
Maybe he has a big rocket too!
looks like a dude...
ReplyDeleteVOICES: But does dude look like a lady?
ReplyDeleteoooooh a lady dude . Old Knudey will be in there like a shot
ReplyDeleteNevermind not being able to hear your lunar neighbours - what if you just can't stand the sight of them?
ReplyDelete(i am work on a pun about Uranus................)
ReplyDeleteBEAST: Knudsen can be heard humming a song called 'There is Nothing Like a Dame".
ReplyDeleteSing along...
There ain't a thing that's wrong with any man here
That can't be cured by pullin' him near
A girly, womanly, female, feminine dame!
ISTVANSKI: You could always report them.
TONY: You snuck in the back door, so to speak, while conducting research into Uranus.
ReplyDeleteI say we just pool our money together and shoot MJ off to the Moon. I'm sure there's a need for a slightly used piece of moose meat like her on yonder satellite.
ReplyDeleteHow will we go to naked shuttle cock games on the moon?
ReplyDeleteI dunno if realestate up there is such a good idea in light of that.
MAIDY: I say we send a space probe up your asteroid.
ReplyDeleteT-BIRD: Naked shuttlecocking will be restricted to the hot side of the moon.
Surely if you can golf on the moon, you can shuttle your cock about too.
Slag
ReplyDeleteBut then we wouldn't be able to access your blog, would we? I say just stay here and face the music.
ReplyDeleteMAIDY: Slutbag.
ReplyDeleteWW: I am broadcasting to you from Planet MJ therefore reception will be even better from the Moon.