Gather round, boys and girls. It’s storytime on Infomaniac.
I’ll begin with an opening line. Are you ready? Here it is…
Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Infomaniac, there lived a…
Well? What are you waiting for? Get your fingers unstuck from up yer arses and type in the next line in the comments section!
Anyone can jump in at anytime and add another line.
Try to make it a continual flow and stick to the storyline that develops. But you creative geniuses (and those on hallucinogenic drugs) may prefer free form style.
Once upon a time in the Kingdom of Infomaniac, there lived a…
Midget princess named MJ.
ReplyDeleteShe was a real slut.
which made her popular at the docks with the slaves from the galley ships, one day while she was banging on the drum she saw.........
ReplyDeletea clearly aroused Alsation...
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeletein the darkness of the ship's hold. Somewhat reluctantly leaving her drum, she started climbing down the ladder, into the hold...
ReplyDelete(Blast you Piggy!)
oh but wait, this is not the tale i really wanted to tell...
ReplyDeleteor was it? Damn, this old age is really getting to me. Did I take my medication this morning? Arrrg. Anyway. Where was I? Oh yes...
ReplyDeleteIn the hold, illuminated by beams of light pouring down from the cracks in the floorboards above was the most glorious booty she had ever seen...
ReplyDelete... she reached out, as if to touch it, when without warning the alsation sank it's teeth into her arse - ripping off her clothes to reveal...
ReplyDeletethat mj was a Monotreme and even though she had a functioning platypussy every boy in her 5th grade class agreed on one thing, she looked different 'down there' than the Teacher did!
ReplyDeleteJust then the pain in her gut started. She thought she going to have a massive bowel movement. However, when she squated to discharge out popped an egg.
ReplyDeleteShe contemplated her stretched sphincter and gazed in amazement at the speckled orb that lay beneath her jacksey.
ReplyDeleteA strange chortling noise emanated from the egg.....
And a strange smell filled her nostrils she remembered this smell from along time ago when....
ReplyDelete... the egg started to crack. With each crackle in the shell, the smell turned to a stench. It was awful. She felt as if she was gonna wretch when ...
ReplyDelete....she suddenly remembered what she'd been doing that night, a few months earlier, when she'd lost her false teeth.
ReplyDelete"What the hell," she said, peering closer at the egg.
"There's something coming out. Why, it's my false teeth! But what's that clamped between them?"
ReplyDeleteIts the shriveled up body of a Gerbil. That must of come from the night that she and Eddie Waring shared that 2 litre bottle of White lightning and played dunking for tag nuggets. I really must get back to my royal blog and post about this but wait, whats that sound of mincing footsteps coming up behind me? OMG its.............
ReplyDelete"Oh my gawd!", she exclaimed and the alsation promptly lost it's hard-on.
ReplyDelete"Noooooooo!", she wailed.
It was a ...
(missed the opportunity to state that the mincing must surely have been IDV)
ReplyDelete*thanks for jumping ahead of me Knudsy*
Freddie Mercury impersonator who looked somewhat confused at the sight of the Alsatian and false teeth holding the shriveled up body of the gerbil.
ReplyDelete"I....I....was looking for Knudsen. I heard tell that he is giving free...."
short arm inspections!" Mj straightened up from her unseemly crouch. Those chained in the lower galley fell into each others arms weeping with relief. "Unhand that rugose rodent, shitebefouled pseudoAlgerian nonMercuroid!" she demanded. "Tis the Fabled Gerbil of
ReplyDeleteDorset!
ReplyDeleteon holiday from Barnsley...
ReplyDeleteThe Freddie Mercury impersonator, whose real name was Harold Rowbottom, backed towards the door, a look of fear and dread upon his fake mustachioed face. "Th...Th...The embassy shall hear of this," he stammered before turning and running for freedom.
ReplyDeleteMJ noticed that as he fled he had dropped....
A box of Ferra Roche ah the Ambassador was spoiling him, she lifted the box of chocolates with her claw like hand and had the greatest thought of all time to.................
ReplyDeletestuff them all up her snatch and wait for the melting point to be reached.
ReplyDeleteBut he was interrupted by...
Michael Barrymore proferring a large sweetie bag filled with amyl nitrate and crack cocaine.
ReplyDeleteI'll have some of that said MJ, sod the Ferrero Roche.
The gerbil's nostrils twitched in anticipation.....
as MJ undressed revealing her..
ReplyDelete...hairy nipples.
ReplyDeleteMichael Barrymore licking his lips, reached inside his jacket and pulled out his....
razor, because the site of those hairy nipples was making him ill. No time for shaving cream. That hair had to come off and now!
ReplyDeleteQuick as a flash, the razor slid right across her nipples, revealing the legend '666' beneath.
ReplyDeleteBarrymore squealed, reached for his mobile phone and dialled...
for Garfer the part time pool attendant.
ReplyDeleteIt seemed like forever for...
But in fact it was only 2 minutes until the horny garfer turned up and started to make out with Barrymore and fondle his comic talent (it was quite small) Mj wasn't impressed so left them to it and headed towards the local sex shop to get something for her tea. Inside the shop S.I.D. was giving a demostration to customers with.......
ReplyDeletea rampant rabbit and a packet of pork scratchings.
ReplyDeleteMJ asked if she could have a go, but the shop owner intervened and told her...
that he was expecting Piggy and Old Knudsen for their 9 a.m. gimp mask fitting.
ReplyDeleteAs the shopkeeper turned to grease the masks MJ noted a box on the shelf marked...
"Ribbed for Her Pleasure"
ReplyDelete"Protection against STDs"
Dumb as a tree stump, she could not understand what this all meant so she went over to the counter and asked the shopkeeper to explain to her what the markings on the boxes where.
ReplyDelete