Sunday, September 27, 2009

Hot Tub Homo

We’ve anxiously awaited the return of Inexplicable DeVice (IVD) from his holidays in Yorkshire.

We’d hoped for some photos of the scenic hills and dales and sure enough, IVD delivered.

But we weren’t expecting to see this! …


(click to get up close and personal)

Why are there so many bubbles? Has he eaten a dodgy curry?

What does that sign on the wall say?

Is that duct tape holding the plumbing together?

Is he nekkid?

Can you catch herpes from a hot tub?

And lastly, where’s my postcard?

28 comments:

  1. Obviously he’s filling a vat with the famous Yorkshire pudding...

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  2. A Hot Tub and a Homo - works for me :)

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  3. Coffee and crosswords in the tub. How delightful. Notice how he's photoshopped the brand name to "Sport Tub" from the more accurate "Spurt Tub".

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  4. tut tut tut H'emjzay mons cherie,
    zees is sooo phewtooshop-ped!

    Monsieur DeVice ees far too long to feet eento un ordinairee h'aute-tuub..
    long az een "toll" you seely woman!

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  5. Looks like a great big delicious cream cake to me!

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  6. That' how they have their champagne in Yorkshire MJ, it's a bit warm for my taste but they tell me it goes well with 'Toad in the Hole'.

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  7. Oh hai XL!

    To answer a few of the questions. I'm sure he's naked and yes, you can catch all sorts of nasty things in a hot tub.

    Email me your paypal ID and I will send you the two dollar postage.

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  8. *ahem* In answer to your questions:

    No. No dodgy curry, just the most powerful jet setting - most invigorating!

    The sign says "no mortals allowed".

    Ummm... Yes. That is duct tape...

    Yes. Yes I was! Well, I had short shorts on to get in (didn't want anyone to get an eyeful), but removed them once I'd lowered myself into the roiling depths.

    I wouldn't imagine anything could survive long in that 'tub as there was so much chlorine. Even a hardened pool goer such as myselves couldn't stand it for more than 20 mins.

    Your postcard was sent on Thursday, so hopefully you'll get it next week.

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  9. Ah, IVD. The man for who the term "cream bath" has a very definite meaning.

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  10. those bubbles are from the jets and not bubble bath? who knew? xoxox

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  11. XL: 1st!

    Yay!

    AYEM8Y: Obviously he’s filling a vat with the famous Yorkshire pudding...

    Ah, Yorkshire pud. Always light and poofy, er, I mean puffy.

    XL: Goin' to get in the hot tub
    Gonna make me sweat


    Ha! Thanks for the celebrity hot tub party link.

    And which celebrity do you suppose will be joining IVD?

    DAMIEN: A Hot Tub and a Homo - works for me :)

    Will you be joining your Host?

    MR. PEENEE: Coffee and crosswords in the tub. How delightful. Notice how he's photoshopped the brand name to "Sport Tub" from the more accurate "Spurt Tub".

    Ha! So he has, the rascal.

    Jizzmaster Jacuzzi has a nice ring to it too.

    DONN: tut tut tut H'emjzay mons cherie,
    zees is sooo phewtooshop-ped!
    Monsieur DeVice ees far too long to feet eento un ordinairee h'aute-tuub..
    long az een "toll" you seely woman!


    And so slim he might vanish down the drain!

    JASON: Looks like a great big delicious cream cake to me!

    Or a cream poof, er, cream puff!

    LULU: That' how they have their champagne in Yorkshire MJ, it's a bit warm for my taste but they tell me it goes well with 'Toad in the Hole'.

    And ‘Spotted Dick’ no doubt.

    Speaking of spotted dick, have you ever seen IVD’s warty wand (scroll down after clicking but prepared to be horrified).

    CYBERPOOF: To answer a few of the questions. I'm sure he's naked and yes, you can catch all sorts of nasty things in a hot tub.
    Email me your paypal ID and I will send you the two dollar postage.


    Has your hot tub rash cleared up?

    Just kidding about the postage.

    IVD: *ahem* In answer to your questions:
    No. No dodgy curry, just the most powerful jet setting - most invigorating!
    The sign says "no mortals allowed".
    Ummm... Yes. That is duct tape...
    Yes. Yes I was! Well, I had short shorts on to get in (didn't want anyone to get an eyeful), but removed them once I'd lowered myself into the roiling depths.
    I wouldn't imagine anything could survive long in that 'tub as there was so much chlorine. Even a hardened pool goer such as myselves couldn't stand it for more than 20 mins.
    Your postcard was sent on Thursday, so hopefully you'll get it next week.


    Quite frankly, we would prefer to imagine you nekkid than in short shorts.

    MAGO: Ah, IVD. The man for who the term "cream bath" has a very definite meaning.

    He’s creamylicious despite the short shorts.

    SAVANNAH: those bubbles are from the jets and not bubble bath? who knew? xoxox

    Twelfth…yay!

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  12. one bottle of bleach should make it all safe again.

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  13. one bottle of bleach should make it all safe again.

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  14. I'm blessed, never having caught anything nasty in a hot tub.

    Unlike an ex who did indeed catch something quite vile

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  15. It looks like the twin-tub washing machine my granny use to wash her drawers in.

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  16. BOXER: one bottle of bleach should make it all safe again.

    There’s no need to repeat yourself.

    CYBERPOOF: I'm blessed, never having caught anything nasty in a hot tub.
    Unlike an ex who did indeed catch something quite vile


    Did the “something quite vile” play hard to get?

    MITZI: It looks like the twin-tub washing machine my granny use to wash her drawers in.

    We can see why.

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  17. I'm not sure what you mean.

    I think it's time for some Champagne.

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  18. He is entirely too happy to be alone in that tub. I suspect those jets aren't the only things doing the blowing!

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  19. IVD, why can't we see the bottle of Champagne in the picture?

    I thought hot tubs are always accompanied by champers.

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  20. With regard to the issue of content, the sublime beauty of the sexual signifier seems very disturbing in light of a participation in the critical dialogue of the 90s.

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  21. And Roses, you called me a rude name in Chinese yesterday.

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  22. You called me MJ?

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  23. soaking in chlorine for twenty minutes explains those luminous white legs .

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  24. but why would someone feel the need to take a bath in their living room, or porch when the good lord invented bathrooms!

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  25. BITCHES: We interrupt this champers fest to apologize for calling Kapitano "Mago" when clearly it was Kapitano who left the comment, not Mago... although Mago DID leave a comment later. We mixed them up!

    We have made this type of error before as you may recall in the great XL/Eroswings mix-up.

    We are obviously in need of a lie down (or a milder beverage) and shall return to post much later.

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