We first wrote about this gay retirement home in 2008. Since then, so many more aging homosexuals have joined Infomaniac that we thought it was time for an update.
Are you a gay who’s going grey?
A poof with snow on the roof?
Have we got a place for you!
WELCOME TO TAZZY AND PIGGY’S RETIREMENT HOME FOR TIRED OLD POOFTERS!
Come on in!
Join our hosts
Tazzy and Piggy (two aging poofs from Yorkshire) for a tour of this exceptional gay retirement home.
You pause on the front step, looking perplexed as there’s nothing resembling a doorbell or a knocker.
“Simpleton,” sniffs Piggy. “See that slot in the door at hip height? Just slip your
todger through the slot and we’ll cum to greet you.” ...
[via]
Once you're inside, a portrait of
Quentin Crisp greets you in the grand entrance hall.
(Link provided for non-homosexuals)
Quentin Crisp
Photos of dead gay icons line the walls of your new home. They’re all here: Judy Garland, Oscar Wilde, Liberace, Joan Rivers… oh wait, she’s still got a few years left on that face lift.
(with apologies to Michael Rivers).
Tazzy and Piggy lead you to the communal “living” room where you’ll find all your old gay friends.
“Lawks!” screams a freakishly tall, rake-thin figure as he bumps his head on the ceiling.
Gasp! Its
IVD!
(The Home was designed by Piggy, who, by the way, is a Pygmy… a ginger Pygmy, actually. Anyway, Pygmies have no concept that the rest of the world might be over 4 feet 11 inches tall so the freakishly tall IVD is having difficulty getting about in his new home.)
Piggy the Pygmy (left) and the freakishly tall IVD (right) out for their morning constitutional. Note that Piggy is still able to walk upright without the aid of a Zimmer frame.
Why, you ask, is the relatively young IVD living in a home for aging poofs?
IVD is only in his LATE thirties but he’s developed an old lady’s taste as seen here…
IVD’s twee little cakes. Perfect to serve at the old poofs’ home with tea and a game of bridge.
As we scan the room, we see more familiar faces.
Why, there’s
Mr. Frobisher! And he’s made a friend!...
Frobi (right with feathered mask) with unidentified friend on left. Perhaps we should have called it a “Camp” instead of a Home?
Old Knudsen appears to be disoriented…
I’m not ghey! Where’s the gurlyboys?
“What about activities and events?” you inquire.
We’re glad you asked.
Come along to the spa and relax in the hot tub!…
Or join
Ayem8y in the gym to pump it up …
“Will there be houseboys?” asks
Normadesmond …
Why of course, Miss Desmond.
“What about Internet access? I NEED TO BLOG!!!” you fret.
Piggy assures us, “We’re fully equipped so you need never stop blogging ‘til the day you die. Access all your faves… like
Infomaniac, for example!”
“Will I have my own private bedroom?” you wonder.
“We’re still working on that,” smirks Piggy. “For now you’ll have to share a room.”…
“What about a dress code?” asks
Mr. Peenee. “Can I wear my special hat?”
No. No, you can’t. But everyone else can cum as they are.
Felix In Hollywood and
kabuki zero (pictured below) reviewing the many amenities of Tazzy and Piggy’s Retirement Home For Tired Old Poofters …
So cum enjoy the good life at
TAZZY AND PIGGY’S RETIREMENT HOME FOR TIRED OLD POOFTERS!
We’re sold on getting old!
