Sunday, November 30, 2008

The Faith Tones, Revisited




The pious amongst you may remember last week’s Saintly Sunday post featuring the lovely Faith Tones…





We here at Infomaniac wondered whatever happened to this girl group.

The original members have all gone their separate ways (i.e. reform school and beauty boot camp) but in their place, the Faith Tones have reformed with some familiar faces and a brand new album…



(left to right: Old Knudsen, Mutley the Dog, Ginro)

[photo above courtesy of Ginro]

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Shopping for Houseboys

Mistress MJ is out shopping for houseboys…



See you back here on Sunday.

Bitches.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Filthy Friday


(Click for maximum pleasure)

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Cooking With Passion

Here’s proof that our Famulus is not just a pretty, um, face.

Famulus informs us of a new cookbook entitled “Natural Harvest – A Collection of Semen-Based Recipes”.


“Semen is an exciting ingredient that can give every dish you make an interesting twist."

So if you enjoy cooking with passion, give it a try!



Infomaniac would now like to take this opportunity to wish our friends in the United States a Happy Thanksgiving.

Perhaps you can use this cookbook to create a nice stuffing for the turkey!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

FamulARSE

As you know, all new male Infomaniac readers must submit a photo of their bare buttocks to Mistress MJ.

Without further ado, we present the derriere of FAMULUS!...



It’s FAMtastic!

It’s a FamulARSE!!!

Infomaniac is pleased to add this bewitching botty to our ever-expanding collection. To view more alluring arses, click here!

For those of you slackers who haven’t yet submitted your photos, now is the time.

Shy fellas may request that Mistress MJ keep their backside away from prying eyes in her private collection.

But the bold and the brave may submit photos for publication here on Infomaniac; your source for pleasing posteriors, hirsute hindquarters and beauteous botties.

Monday, November 24, 2008

Blogging Roundup

A peek at ‘the week that was’ with a handful of Infomaniac’s readers.




Before we get started, let’s send out birthday hugs and kisses today to our Tickers in Wales…



He’s not ghey, he’s just a little bit poofy

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TICKERS!



Speaking of poofiness, HARDHOUSE is back on the dancefloor!

And he’s single!



It’s been TWO YEARS since we’ve heard from Hardhouse so let’s break out the bubbly!



Now moving along to the week that was…

As you recall, last week we examined the contents of Beast’s MANBAG and Mr. Frobisher’s MANBAG.

MANBAG MANIA continues this week as we peek inside the bags of SCARLET and FAMULUS.


Miss Scarlet’s handbag



Highlights include spare knickers and a vat o’ Vaseline.



Famulus’ MANBAG



Current buns and assorted detritus. How does it all fit into that tiny sac?



TONY:

TONY relives his acid trip.





SAVANNAH:

SAVANNAH’s finally moved into her southern plantation house.

Note that MY MISSING HOUSEBOYS have jumped ship from the clutches of the evil CyberPoof and are now at Miss Savannah’s beck and call…





BEAST:

BEAST gives us his watered-down version of my Saintly Sunday...






Both EROSWINGS and CYBERPETE handed out Lemonade Awards of which Mistress MJ was a recipient.



I did not claim my award, however, as I refused to share it with BEAST.

Well, it’s hardly a special award if they hand it out to just anyone, is it?

However, I did show up at the After Party with my entourage of (ex)houseboys …



And later, on top of George Clooney…



And speaking of Eroswings, thanks to Eros I learned how to make words blink like this and you can too if you scroll down to the bottom of this post.



OLD KNUDSEN:

OLD KNUDSEN ponders which celebrity will be the next to die.





MANUEL:

MANUEL has given up fags.

Beware.






And finally…


NEW CUNT OF THE WEEK


This week’s New Cunt of the Week is a bona fide Canuck.

All the way from Winnipeg, Manitoba, it’s PONYGIRL!...


If this photo looks blurry, you've had too much to drink


MJ: Why the name “Ponygirl”?

PONYGIRL: I am a Ponygirl of the Equine Kind, not the Submissive Kind.... which I had to find out when I googled my own blog name one day. Much to my horror (and curiosity), I discovered why there is a lot of traffic to my blog but no one seems to stick around and read anything! Go figure... I've got whips and spurs, but have yet to use them on another human bean.

MJ: So you’re saying you’re not this type of Ponygirl?...



PONYGIRL: Certainly not!

MJ: Occupation?

PONYGIRL: I am a nurse.



Nurse Ponygirl administers a little TLC to Eros, who has come down with a nasty case of the MANFLU.


MJ: So you’re an animal lover?

PONYGIRL: I have lots of four-legged friends whom I tend to spend way too much money on. At the moment, I am living with a dog who is 100 lbs of muscle and chicken feathers, an old cat who tends to bite those he does not know but is getting senile so tends to forget he doesn't know you, and a young cat who has a propensity for eating things she shouldn't and cleaning the heating ducts in my house. I also have a 6 1/2 year old horse who is a total pocket pony but with good manners and the sweetest face - gotta love those big brown eyes. (He does not live with me, but would gladly come in the house if given half the chance!) Every single one of these animals has cost me well over $1000 in vet bills at one point or another (that is EACH one, not all together....).

MJ: Personality traits?

PONYGIRL: I am not shy, can be pretty raunchy at times and have been known to make grown men blush (which is actually lots of fun!). But I am also a very compassionate, caring person (hence the nursing thing and the animal issues) who loves to laugh and play and have fun. I have a good brain in my head and thoroughly enjoying picking the brains of others, if they are willing to share their thoughts and theories with me.

There ain't nothing that I have seen, heard, touched or smelled that can truly gross me out.

MJ: Obviously you’ve never seen Beast’s bare bottom….



PONYGIRL:I can, however, gross a lot of other people out with pretty vivid descriptions of things I have seen at work. LOL!

I get totally freaked by spiders, though... and the bigger they are, the faster I run. Other bugs are not an issue.

MJ: How long have you been blogging?

PONYGIRL: I have been blogging for a little over six months and probably spend way too much time in front of the computer... just like everyone else here, so I guess I am either in good company or we are all pretty delusional.... take your pick.

MJ: I’d say you’re delusional.







Note: New posting on Wednesday. Make the most of this one in the meantime.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Domestic Dilemma



As you can see, I’m in a domestic dilemma since CyberPoof stole my houseboys.

Too much housework and not enough help.

While I’m in here, I might as well look for Tickers’ missing mojo.

Is anyone else missing anything that may have disappeared into this black hole?

Friday, November 21, 2008

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Good Vibrations

Whilst CyberPete the Queen of Denmark was being serviced by my houseboys, I snuck into his private chambers and stole his undulating undies

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

CyberPete: Queen of Denmark

Denmark’s biggest poofter has been hiding his face from us for months.

The most we’ve seen is a glimmer of glitter…




And a hint of hairline…






But our CyberPete (CyberPoof) is finally ready to face the world!



Ladies and Gentlemen, CyberPete exposed!...






Yes, that’s his darling Kylie Minogue at his side.

Kaz insists that this is really a photograph of Rick Astley but I believe the head, at least, belongs to CyberPoof.

Some of you may not be aware that CyberPete is one HIGH-MAINTENANCE POOF.

So high maintenance, in fact, that he requires a team to work on him first thing in the morning to make him presentable to the world…





This would all be well and good, each to his own and all, if he hadn’t stolen my best houseboys and relocated them to Denmark!

Watch here as my (former) houseboys go about preparing CyberPoof for his day.

And listen as he sings out his extensive list of demands!



Silver garters?

Undulating undies? With marabou frills?

Purple nylon girdle with orange blossom buds?

Peekaboo blouse?

Polka-dotted dickie?

Lavender spats?

Cutie chamois booties with leopard skin bows?

Pink brocaded bodice with floofy fuzzy ruffs?

Gorgeous bright blue bloomers?

Organdy snood?



Can there be any doubt the lady is a Queen?

Now return my houseboys to me immediately, bitch.



Note: I believe Queen CyberPete may be having some sort of psychotic breakdown at the end when he asks to be dressed up in liverwurst and camembert cheese but isn’t all royalty a little daft?

Monday, November 17, 2008

Blogging Roundup

A peek at ‘the week that was’ with a handful of Infomaniac’s readers.




The following is an abbreviated edition of the Blogging Roundup as Mistress MJ has cramps and would prefer to spend time curled up in the fetal position.

As if that’s not hell enough, BETTY had to go and tell us that Reg Varney died. (BBC report here).





Reg was best known for his comedic role as bus driver Stan Butler in the British TV show “On the Buses.”

If you’re looking for me, I’m in front of telly watching my On the Buses Ultimate Collection. All seven series! All 74 episodes!





BEAST AND MR. FROBISHER:

What’s in your MANBAG?

That was the question of the week as both Beast and Mr. Frobisher compared MANBAGS, or “murses” as they’re also known.

This is Beast’s poor excuse of a MANBAG…



Pathetic, isn’t it?

And one can smell the pong from across The Pond!

The contents of the so-called MANBAG are even duller than the MANBAG itself but in the unlikely event that they’re of interest to you, read about it here.


Pictured below is Mr. Frobisher’s more stylish MANBAG…




The contents of Frobi’s MANBAG are by far more interesting than Beast’s…




A few of the highlights in Mr. Frobisher’s MANBAG include the following (and I quote)…

My Colt Shower Shot attachment. As it says on the box "This water accessory easily installs onto any standard shower for an incredible burst of water pleasure and cleansing sensation. Soft, Jelly dong screws into the chrome flex hose for a secure mount. Unscrew shower head. Add washers to prevent water leak and screw in hose." This is an essential bit of kit, people still talk of my impression of the Trevi fountain in Rome when I hooked it up to the power shower in the changing rooms of the David Lloyd Sports Centre and shot artistic jets of water out of my mouth!

Red hankie ;-)

Leather cock strap to keep everything up together and give that "bulge appeal" that women like so much. The male equivalent of a push up bra.

Pro-Sport Jock Strap, well you never know when your going to be invited to a Underwear party!

Machismo magazine - Latino Bad Boy Issue! The Worlds #1 Latino Sex Magazine.

2 packets of king size rolling papers (pure hemp of course) with an eight of Red Lebanese Hash and a quarter ounce of sticky black Afghan cream hash (personal - for medical reasons, my Social Anxiety Disorder).



Bitches, I could go on about the fascinating contents of Mr. Frobisher’s manly MANBAG but you can read about it yourself here.




ANONYMOUS BOXER:

Boxer invited her readers to send in photographs of their bulletin boards.

We here at Infomaniac think it was a fab idea and may consider doing this with our own bitches in future.

A personal fave was Old Knudsen’s bulletin board…



Click the pic to read his Post-it notes and observe the poked-out eyes of Oprah, Dr. Phil and the Sarah Palin family.




FIRST NATIONS:

Nations outdid herself this week with tales from the womens washroom.



And if that wasn’t hilarious enough, read “You gotta wash yo ass!

The bitch is a brilliant writer. Get yo ass over there if you haven’t paid her a visit yet.



KAPITANO:

Someone wanted to give our Kapi a blowjob at midnight but Kapi had a headache.



Then, again at midnight, someone wanted to give Kapi a deep, long, wet blowjob.

But they cancelled!



EROSWINGS:

Eros presented a display of World War II propaganda recruiting posters.

It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.
It's fun to stay at the y-m-c-a.

You can get yourself cleaned, you can have a good meal,
You can do whatever you feel...






OLD KNUDSEN:

Old Knudsen pointed out to us that our Donn Coppens (Homo Escapeons) and Jeremy Beadle were separated at birth!


Donnnnnnn


Jeremy Beadle the late king of British pranksters.




And last but not least…

A belated Happy Birthday (November 15th) to Canada’s own WW in Winnipeg, Manitoba!


Donnnn (left) with Winky Weinerhead the birthday boy



AND FINALLY…


NEW CUNT OF THE WEEK

Hey everybody, it’s LEAH!




Being that I’m in pain and too lazy to make up anything original about this great gal, I’ll just copy and paste what it says in her Blogger Profile…

I'm working on my criminal justice dissertation, and I sort of keep house in Brooklyn for my husband Sgt. Pepper, my 7-year-old daughter Hedgehog, an ancient mutt, a hamster, and a beta fish; I play violin and mandolin; I knit, bead, and crochet. Our house is overrun with projects, thousands of books, and hundreds of skeins of yarn.

Want to know more? Then read her “100 Things About Me.”

Don’t have time? Well lucky you! I’ve copied the highlights below!...

I’ve always had a thing for a man in uniform.

I’ve never been really drunk.

I love hamsters.
(Note to Leah: If you love hamsters, you'll love the
hamster wheel!...even though it's a gerbil.)

I’ve always had very vividly characterized imaginary boyfriends, even when I’ve had actual real boyfriends. My first “boyfriends” were Kirk and Spock. My current one is Severus Snape.

I am deeply ashamed of my rampant materialism.

When I was little, I used to borrow my cousin’s bra and wear it around stuffed with cotton balls.

I am not a prude. In fact, sometimes I think I’m as far from a prude as one can be.

I adore canned chicken spread.

I have White Trash in me from my dad’s side. I embrace it.

I love prescription tranquilizers.

I am so glad that I’m a woman.


Mistress MJ would just like to add one more thing about Leah…

She has admitted that she has a thing for Old Knudsen!

I think I can speak for Anonymous Boxer, Carnalis, Savannah and First Nations when I say, “Back off, bitch!”

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Grooming on the Go

Mistress MJ boarded the bus and seated herself behind a lovely young lady with a rather pronounced Adam’s apple.

The blonde took out her hefty cosmetics kit and began applying full makeup: concealer, foundation, blush, eye shadow, mascara, and lipstick.



Mistress MJ is not averse to a lady applying a little lippy but this was taking personal grooming in public too far.



However, Mistress MJ said, “live and let live,” that is until the "lady" raised her arms high in the air and applied her deodorant!

And then a man a few seats behind started clipping his fingernails!




So what personal grooming habits do you consider acceptable or unacceptable in public?

And what grooming faux pas have you been witness do?